


The Great Supervillain Switch-Up

by CinnamonStyx



Category: DCU, Justice League - All Media Types
Genre: Bodyswap, Gen, Supervillains
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-24
Updated: 2019-09-17
Packaged: 2020-09-25 22:50:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 23,776
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20379430
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CinnamonStyx/pseuds/CinnamonStyx
Summary: Lex Luthor assembles a new Injustice League to combat the JLA. Unfortunately, while prepping to fight them Luthor causes the entire team to switch bodies with one another. Now Luthor, Joker, Cheetah, Mirror Master, Black Manta, and Star Sapphire are in the wrong bodies and aren't too happy about it. Once they're switched, adjusting to this change is hard enough. But returning things to normal seems impossible.





	1. Switched!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm trying something different for this story. Usually, when I write a multi-chapter story I try to come up with a detailed plot for every single chapter before I start writing and then I begin. But this time I just came up with a premise and I'm going to see where it takes me. I'm already having fun with it and I think it'll make for an entertaining story. Before we start, I just want you to know that the main reason that this story is rated mature is that I apparently have a very immature sense of humour and there are probably going to be more than a few sexual jokes in this story. Nothing explicit though. I still don't entirely understand the rating system so I hope I'm doing this right.

It wasn't exactly an original plan, Lex would admit. But bringing back the Injustice League, the greatest foes of the core JLA members, sounded like a good idea to him. Why alter what was already perfect. Of course, he was no fool. He knew some changes would need to be made to ensure his success. So to change it up, he brought in Black Manta instead of Ocean Master, Cheetah instead of Circe, and Star Sapphire instead of Sinestro just to name a few alterations. He was confident in his success, even if this maneuver had failed before. In Lex Luthor's mind, there was no way the Injustice League would be defeated again.

So Luthor's current state of laying buried in rubble inside his own secret base before he'd even had a chance to fight the Justice Leauge was really pissing him off.

Luthor couldn't see anything except a few rays of light coming in through the layer of metal and stone above him. He wasn't panicking, Lex Luthor never panicked. For a man his age, he was in excellent shape and could get all the rubble burying him out of the way. At least, that was what he told himself.

But when Luthor put his hands against the sheet of metal above him and pushed he became surprised when it moved. I mean sure, he wasn't moving it as effortlessly as Superman would but he was certainly having an easier time than expected. He strained himself and within a matter of minutes, there was more light shining down on him. Pushing again, Luthor tried to remove the metal but found it too difficult to move any further.

He wasn't the most flexible person, but he realized that he could squeeze his way out if he forced it. Lex tried to employ this plan and to his surprise, he managed to slink his way out of the crevasse as if he was a much more flexible man.

As soon as Luthor stepped out into the crumbling remained of the Injustice League's underground lair, he realized something was very wrong. Firstly, he felt like he was almost naked with his bare feet touching the ground and him feeling a draft against exposed skin. He knew there was a possibility of having lost his clothes during the explosion but found it unlikely. Then, he felt something in his lower back twitch. He had no idea what but was starting to an impression.

"I'm going to look down now…" Luthor announced to himself. "I had better not see what I think I'm about to see."

Luthor looked down at himself and saw this he was in a much more slender, feminine body. A body covered completely in fur.

_"Cheetah!"_

Filled with rage and confusion, Luthor looked through the remains of his hideout for any other survivors of the incident. While looking, he went over the series of events that led him to his current state. He had made plans to subtly rewire the brains of the JLA to turn them all against each other using an artifact called the Medusa Mask. But when he tried to put the mask to the test, it sort of exploded in front of him and the rest of the Injustice League. All seemed somewhat logical so far, but Luthor still had no idea why he was inside Cheetah's body.

"Cheetah! Where the hell are you!" Luthor paused when he noticed how strange it was to hear his words with Cheetah's voice attached to them.

Luthor heard the shifting of rubble somewhere. He normally wouldn't have been able to pick up on this but he figured Cheetah's enhanced hearing was helping him right now. Quickly, Luthor hurried to the pile of shifting rubble and worked to move some of the larger pieces out of the way. Once there was a large enough hole, a purple gloved hand reached out. Luthor grabbed the Joker by his hand and pulled him out of the gloves. His eyes were closed and he seemed dazed.

"I heard someone say my name…" Joker's eyes slowly adjusted. Once they were opened, he stared up into Luthor's eyes with a look of rage on his face. "That's my body! Who are you and why do you look like me?"

"So, you're Cheetah? You might want to look at yourself." Luthor told her.

"What are you…" Cheetah looked down and saw the purple suit she was dressed up in. "No! No, no, no! What happened?"

"I'm still trying to figure that out. It's Luthor, by the way." Luthor helped Cheetah get back on her feet.

"God, have all of us been switched around?" Cheetah asked. "You need to get things back to normal."

"Naturally." Luthor nodded. "No offence, but I prefer having human skin."

_"Luthor, you arrogant imbecile! Where are you and what have you done to us?"_ a voice echoed from a hallway behind Lex and Cheetah followed by a pair of footsteps. The Scottish accent of the voice vaguely sounded like Mirror Master, or at least his body. But the accent sounded far less pronounced now and if it was Mirror Master he certainly sounded like he had a bigger vocabulary than usual.

Cheetah and Luthor looked to the dark, partially-collapsed hallway and saw the bodies of Mirror Master and, to Lex's relief, Lex Luthor step out of the darkness.

"Which one of you is Luthor?" Mirror Master asked, looking back and forth between Luthor and Cheetah.

"Isn't he next to you?" Cheetah smirked at her own joke.

"Shut up, Joker!" Mirror Master snapped. "Er, whoever you are."

"Relax, I'm Luthor." Lex took a step forward. "I take it your minds were switched too. So, who here was lucky enough to receive my body?"

"Oh, don't even start." whoever was in Luthor's body frowned. "This had better not be permanent by the way. Otherwise, Hal will never be able to love me again. Not to mention I can't use my powers now."

"Got it, you're Star Sapphire." Luthor looked away from his own body and over at Mirror Master. "And you are?"

"Black Manta. Except now I'm stuck inside an out of shape Scotsman!" Mirror Master, or apparently Black Manta, shouted.

"Okay, there are only two of us left. Let's all keep calm for now." Luthor advised the other two. "We just need to find-"

_"Oh Lexy! I think I'm going crazier than usual!"_ a voice came from a hall on the opposite side of the room. The speech pattern was a dead ringer for the Joker's while the voice was deep, almost like it was being filtered through a voice modulator.

"Son of a- That's my voice!" Black Manta exclaimed. "That clown bastard is in my body!"

"So that means… Ugh! _Mirror Master_ is in _me!_" Star Sapphire realized. "Disgusting!"

Just as expected, the bodies of Star Sapphire and Black Manta stepped into the light. Star Sapphire, being controlled by Mirror Master, seemed especially confused while Black Manta, controlled by Joker, looked excited by how much he kept looking around.

"Awright, someone explain to me what's going on?" Mirror Master asked, his Scottish accent being applied to Star Sapphire's voice.

"Everyone, let's calm down." Luthor stepped onto a pile of rocks and metal in the hopes of commanding the room. "Clearly, my plot to destroy the Justice League from the inside is a failure."

Very abruptly, the Joker burst into laughter. The voice modulator inside Black Manta's helmet modified and distorted his already disturbing laugh, making the others a little uncomfortable.

"My goodness, Lexy. You're stuck inside her?" Joker continued to giggle. "This is the best."

"Just shut up. Let's all regroup and come up with a plan. Figure out what went wrong for a start. I'll be in my private quarters, or what's left of it anyway. The rest of you, talk amongst yourselves while I fix things." he lets out an exasperated sigh. _"As usual."_

An hour had passed and Lex had holed himself up in the remains of his personal office while the rest of the swapped Injustice League was waiting outside. Most of them had sat down on the floor except for Star Sapphire who had been pacing around for a while now.

*******

"Ugh, this is ridiculous." Star Sapphire complained. "If we have to wait another minute, I'm going in there and beating up Lex with my bare hands."

"Would those be _his_ bare hands?" Joker chuckled.

"You shut up." Black Manta told him. "I can't stand hearing you in my body."

"This is no picnic for me either." Joker crossed his arms. "My handsome body is being worn around by cat-lady over there." he pointed over at Cheetah in his body.

"Your body isn't exactly what I'd call pleasant." Cheetah scowled. "What's this you have in your hair, by the way? It smells almost as bad as it feels."

"Can we just agree that I got screwed the hardest?" Star Sapphire asked. "In terms of who got sent into my body, I mean."

"Hey, what's that supposta mean?" Mirror Master asked.

"Don't play dumb with me, McCulloch!" Star Sapphire gritted her teeth together and pointed a finger at Mirror Master in her body. "You're acting a little too quiet. But I bet in your head you're celebrating being in control of an attractive woman's body. You little pervert."

"You think I'm enjoying his?" Mirror Master narrowed his eyes at Star Sapphire, seeming offended. "Bah! These clothes you're wearing are so tight they're strangling me. _And_ I'm cold all the time. Why do you dress like this!"

"Oh shit… You don't think Luthor's turned on by being inside my body?" Cheetah realized, standing up. "Maybe I should check on him."

"Barbara, you're a giant Thundercat." Star Sapphire stated. "I don't think you have to worry about that."

"I don't know, I've met some guys who were into the whole cat thing." Cheetah admitted.

"For the love of god please stop talking." Black Manta hurriedly urged her.

Interrupting their conversation, the door to Lex's office slid open and out he stepped. He was smiling the type of smile that said "I'm better than you" as he looked over the rest of his team.

"Ladies and gentlemen, I've got good news and bad news." Luthor stated.

"Start with the good news I guess." Cheetah requested.

"The good news is, I know what happened and we may be able to reverse it." Luthor clasped his hands together. He winced when his brand new claws accidentally dug into him. "Urgh, dammit…" he put his hands back at his sides and resumed talking. "That artifact we used to try and control the Justice League, the Medusa Mask, it was more powerful and unstable than we anticipated. It was _only_ supposed to control their emotions. But when I tried it on, it created an explosion and switched around our minds."

"Yes, yes, we know that already." Black Manta rolled his eyes. "Get to the point."

"Well, it's simple, we just need to recover the Medusa Mask and we'll be able to get back inside our own bodies." Luthor paused. "But… Here's where the bad news comes in. You see, I reviewed the security footage and it turns out the mask moved on its own. And it flew out of the building. So we'll have to recover it."

This information did not seem to sit well with the rest of the Injustice League. They just glared at Lex without saying anything. All of them were varying degrees of angry with the situation. Nobody knew what to say. After all, from the sound of things, it seemed like they'd be stuck like this for a while.

"Well, this is going to be very interesting…" Joker trailed off. "Ahahaha!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope that's a good start. I'm having fun writing all these characters. The only one I'm not confident with in terms of characterization is Star Sapphire. I wanted to have Sinestro in this story at first but then I wanted to include more female characters so I swapped him for Star Sapphire. I'm not too familiar with her though so I hope I'm getting the characterization right.


	2. Making Adjustments

One day had passed since the body-swapping incident and nobody was quite happy with it. Luthor had given everyone strict orders. They stay inside the Injustice League's underground base, do not make any type of contact with the outside world, and reconvene in the morning to discuss plans.

So, at half past eight, the six Injustice Leaguers were gathered in their hideout's meeting room. It had undergone some damages after the incident on the previous day. Most obviously, a large light fixture had landed on the table. But it was still useable as a meeting spot.

Luthor had been up since six that morning and had been rehearsing what to say. He needed to make everything he did seem effortless. Even when the truth was he had no idea what he was doing. He had yet to adjust to being inside Cheetah's body. Being in another person's body would be a strange enough experience, but when that person is both the opposite gender and an animal hybrid it added two whole new layers.

Presently, Luthor had sat down at the head of the meeting table and had been watching his associates arrive over the past half hour. Once they were all there, Luthor stood up from his chair and looked over the table.

"I have great news everybody." Luthor stared down the whole table.

"You've already figured out how to unswitch us?" Black Manta asked, a gleam of hope in his voice.

"Unfortunately, no. But I have a temporary solution to our problem." Luthor rested his hands on the table. "We'll all help each other out with adjusting to our new bodies. For example, Sapphire, you can tell Mirror Master how your powers work. Or Manta, you can give Joker a rundown of how to use your armour."

"So you have absolutely no idea on how to fix this?" Cheetah asked.

"As of yet, no." Luthor admitted. "I'm working on it and I'll update you when it's time. But for now, this is all we can do. Oh, and nobody else can know about this. So do not leave her and don't contact anyone. You're all dismissed."

With Lex's announcement over, the members of the Injustice League filed out of the room. As Black Manta left, he'd already made plans in his head to spend some time alone. But apparently, Joker did not get this memo.

"Say, Manta! Mind helping a friend out?" Joker approached Black Manta from behind and gave him a pat on the back.

"I'd prefer not to…" Black Manta grumbled.

"It'll just take a moment." Joker redirected Black Manta down the hall and into a bathroom. "Lexy was right, I'd like to know how you use this suit."

"It should be easy… I made it very user friendly." Black Manta remarked.

"Hmmph, not friendly enough." Joker mumbled as they stopped in front of the bathroom mirror. "Just show me how to fire off your lasers and then we'll be done."

"Fine…" Black Manta grabbed Joker by the wrists and held them up to him. "Hmm… Strange to be touching my own body with someone else's hands."

"Just get on with it, will you?" Joker glanced at Black Manta.

"Fine. You can shoot projectiles from my gloves by pressing these buttons." Black Manta pointed at a series of buttons on the Joker's right hand gauntlet. "Different buttons have different intensities. I also have some more weapons back at home on my submarine. Hopefully those are easier to use."

"Was that so hard, Manta?" Joker asked. "Oh, and one last thing. How do I get this helmet off? I was trying all night and I just coulnd't get rid of it."

"Here." Black Manta reached up and pressed a button on the back of the suit's neck. "There's a button at the base of your neck."

The helmet popped off and Joker grabbed it. He removed the helmet from his head and held it under his arm. As soon as Joker got a good luck at his new face (Or more accurately Black Manta's real face) he seemed surprised by something.

"Oh…" Joker seemed at a loss for words.

"There a problem?" asked Black Manta.

"I didn't realize you were _black_, Manta." Joker chuckled. "Was that in bad taste?"

"It's fine. Most people have that reaction. I get it, I almost never take that helmet off."

"Uh huh…" Joker carefully inspected his new face in the mirror. "Does this mean I'm technically doing blackface? I hope not… Even for my standards that isn't funny."

"I'm going now." Black Manta bluntly stated, rolling his eyes and leaving his room. "Enjoy your new armour… I'm going to see if Mirror Master can tell me how to work his gun."

*******

In another part of the hideout, Mirror Master had gone back to another bathroom inside the hideout. Unlike the rest of Luthor's underground lair, this room was mostly intact from the explosion on the previous day. Mirror Master looked at himself in the bathroom's mirror, carefully inspecting his face.

"Awright… Just gotta get this thing off." Mirror Master tugged at the mask over his, or rather Star Sapphire's, face. The mask stretched but no matter how hard he pulled he couldn't get it to peel off.

"Ahem, what're you doing?"

Mirror Master looked over and saw Star Sapphire standing in the doorway to the bathroom.

"Ah, hello Sapphire. Howzitgaun?" Mirror Master smiled at her.

"You haven't been… _Checking yourself out_, have you?" Star Sapphire slowly approached Mirror Master. "I swear to god, if you've been looking at my breasts I will hurt you. I don't even care that it's my body that I'd be hurting."

"Haw! Believe me Hen, even if I wanted to do that I couldn't. I'm just not comfortable inside you." Mirror Master smirked. "I've been tryin' to get this mask off for five, ten minutes and I can't manage it."

"Fine, I'll play teacher." Star Sapphire sighs and rolls her eyes. "You see McCulloch, you aren't technically wearing anything right now."

"Hmm, ya don't say?" Mirror Master smirked.

"Oh, shut up. None of the Lanterns wear anything. Their uniforms are just manifestations from their rings. So all you need to do is imagine what you want to do and it should happen."

"So could I imagine a different costume? 'Cause this one's a little too tight for me."

"Yes, that should work."

"Awright…"

Mirror Master closed his eyes and the gem on the centre of his mask started to glow. His eyes opened again and they glowed the same way. A flash of pink light emitted from him, forcing Star Sapphire to shut her eyes. When the light faded away, Star Sapphire stared back at her old body. Mirror Master had changed her into a pink version of his old costume with the gem still in his forehead and a hole in the top of his face mask to let his new long hair out.

"Ah, now that's much better." Mirror Master smiled as he looked at his new costume.

"Good, glad to see you haven't done anything perverted to my body. I'll be going now. I need to see if Luthor has anything he can tell me about his body." Star Sapphire turned around and left Mirror Master on his own.

*******

Luthor's personal room in the hideout had been hit pretty hard by the explosion but it was still mostly functional. There were a few bits of the ceiling currently on the floor but it still had a bed so it wasn't all bad. Luthor had decided to conduct some independent study on the features of his new body. Right now, that meant he'd taken off what little clothes Cheetah's body had on and was examining himself in front of a full length mirror.

"Hmm…" Luthor examined his claws, making them repeatedly come out and then retract again. "I wonder what kind of damage these can do?"

Lex became distracted when somebody knocked on the door to the room. He glanced over at the door.

"Who is it?" Lex asked.

"Luthor, it's Cheetah." it was still strange to hear Joker's distinct voice identifying itself as Cheetah but Luthor told himself that was just how it was now. "Can I come in? You said you needed help with something."

"Yes, yes, let yourself in." Luthor looked back to the mirror as the door to his room slid open.

As soon as Cheetah saw Lex she froze and glared at him.

"What the hell are you doing?" Cheetah scowled as she got closer to Luthor. "Put my clothes back on!"

"Calm down, Cheetah. It's nothing sexual if that's what you're worried about." Luthor kept his eyes on his reflection. "Besides, you've dressed like this before. Showed up at the old Legion of Doom and everything. Really, you can hardly tell I'm naked."

"_You_ can't make decisions about what to do with _my_ body!" Cheetah growled.

"My apologies…" Luthor walked over to his closet and took out a spare suit. "I was merely hoping that I could get a better look at your strange, hybrid body this way."

"Well… Maybe when you're under my supervision." Cheetah tried to relax as she watched Luthor put one of his suits on to her body. It was definitely too big for her and made him look sloppy and unprofessional.

"How do I look?" Luthor looked down at himself once he got his suit on.

"Add a hat and you'll look like _Top Cat_." Cheetah snickered to herself a bit.

"Well, I think it's a good look. You should try it out sometime." Luthor replied, straightening out a few wrinkles in his suit. "Now, Cheetah, I need you to tell me about what you're able to do. I've already figured out that my strength, agility, and hearing are enhanced. But what else can you do?"

"Well, obviously I'm faster than the average human. I can use my teeth and claws to rip through things a normal person couldn't, my sense of smell is really good..." Cheetah tried to remember her other abilities. For some reason, they weren't coming too her instantly. When you're used to being superhuman it's easy to forget that most other people don't know what it's like. "Oh, and I've also got enhanced durability. I have to be, I can go toe-to-toe with Wonder Woman after all."

"Fascinating, thank you. I'll have to test that on my own." Luthor looked back into the mirror and straightened out his tie.

"Well, be sure to keep your clothes on." Cheetah turned away to leave the room.

"Of course." Luthor glanced at Cheetah one more time. "Oh, that reminds me…"

"What?" Cheetah sighed and looked back to Luthor.

"Do you not have nipples? I didn't see any." Lex seemed absolutely unembarrassed with his incredibly personal question.

"They're under the fur." Cheetah sighed. "Do you have anything else uncomfortable to ask?"

"No, that will be all." Luthor turned back around. "You may leave."

"Good."

*******

In the central area of the underground hideout, Mirror Master had sat down on the floor. He'd gotten bored very easily. There wasn't too much to do. He could test out his new powers but he was feeling lazy and assumed Sapphire had taught him enough. So he was thankful when he saw his old body walking back towards him.

"Ah, they there Manta. Havin' a good time with me?" Mirror Master smirked.

"Hardly." Black Manta replied. "I spent years training my body for combat. And no offence, your body isn't quite up to snuff."

"None taken. I mostly use my mirror gun to fight." Mirror Master stood up from the floor. "Like my new outfit by the way? Sapphire told me how ta change her clothes."

"It's fine. But I didn't come over here to discuss fashion." Black Manta reached around at his belt. "Where is it…"

"Oh, you wanna see how my Mirror Gun works?" Mirror Master smiled. "I can show ya had to do that. It's easy ta use actually."

"I doubt that." Black Manta took the Mirror Gun off his belt and held it up. "It looks complicated."

"Takes some gettin' used to but it's not too difficult. Trust me, I should know. I'm the second Mirror Master after all." Mirror Master held a hand out. "Gimme the gun and I'll show ya what to do."

"Hmm, I could use some guidance." Black Manta nodded and handed off the mirror gun.

"Much appreciated." Mirror Master smiled and turned around. "Awright Manta, follow me. Need to find a mirror for this to work."

"Yes, I figured as much." Black Manta nodded and followed Mirror Master into a bathroom.

"Awright, so here's how to do it." Mirror Master aimed his mirror gun at the bathroom mirror. "First ya gotta find somethin' reflective. Doesn't even have ta be a mirror. Now, step two, you shoot the gun."

Mirror Master pulled the trigger on the mirror gun, sending a ray of blue energy into the mirror. The surface of the mirror rippled like a lake disturbed by a tossed stone.

"And now, it's through the looking glass!" Mirror Master cheered. "C'mon, now. Follow me."

Mirror Master climbed up on to the sink and stuck his hand through the mirror-like it was water. He jumped forward and disappeared through the glass.

"Something tells me I won't like this." Black Manta frowned and climbed up to the sink. He closed his eyes and stepped through the mirror portal. Once on the other side, Black Manta saw he was in the background but the position of everything was inverted. Mirror Master was in front of him, with a big smile on his face.

_"Dlrow rorrim eht ot emoclew!"_ Mirror Master cheered.

Black Manta fell to his knees and put his hands over his ears. He had no idea what Mirror Master had said, to him it was nothing but a string of gibberish. Whatever it was, it had a horrible reverb to it that was giving Manta a migraine.

_"Gnineppah s'tahw?"_ Black Manta tried to stand up but fell to the ground easy again. He realized that the sounds his mouth made sounded familiar in a strange way. On one of the few occasions he fought the heroine Zatanna, the incantations she spoke sounded almost like what he was hearing now.

_"Yrros…"_ Mirror Master seemed a little embarrassed and tried to pick up Black Manta. _"Ereh ni gnisufnoc steg ti."_

Black Manta's head was pounding, he closed his eyes and allowed Mirror Master to manipulate him. When he opened them again Manta saw that he was back on the floor of the original bathroom.

"I felt like puking the first several times I tried it out. If yer gonna do that do it over there." Mirror Master pointed over to the toilet.

"I won't be doing that." Black Manta staggered to his feet and snatched the mirror gun from Mirror Master's hand.

"If you wanna do that again I'm always available." Mirror Master held back some laughter.

"I'm fine…" Black Manta walked out of the bathroom at a brisk pace, not looking back at Mirror Master. "I'll test it some more on my own…"

*******

Meanwhile, the Joker had gone back to his private quarters. He'd tossed Black Manta's helmet off into the corner and had been trying to get the rest of his costume off for nearly five minutes. So far, he'd failed terribly and was unable to peel the wetsuit from his body.

"Damn outfit… It's stuck. Where's the zipper on this thing?" Joker felt around on his body, occasionally pulling at his wetsuit. "C'mon... I hope Manta knows I'm not above flaying myself."

Joker was distracted when he heard the hydraulic sound of his room's door opening. He whirled around and was greeted by Cheetah in his body coming to see him.

"Ah, I was beginning to miss my handsome mug." Joker got closer to his old body and grabbed it by the shoulders.

"I didn't come here so you could admire yourself, Joker." Cheetah grabbed Joker by the arm and moved his hand away from her.

"Oh, then what are you here for?" Joker smiled. "Because I'm perfectly content in staring to my own beautiful eyes."

"My skills revolve around my athleticism and enhanced abilities. In your body, I have none of those things." Cheetah gestured to herself. "So… What exactly can you do? Do you have any assets I can use?"

"Well, I mostly use my superior intellect. And fortunately, that's still in here." Joker pointed to his own head.

"So you don't have anything I can use?" asked Cheetah.

"Well, I have Harley." Joker said.

"I don't want your girlfriend." Cheetah crossed her arms.

"That's okay. I don't want her either!" Joker broke out into laughter.

"So you don't have anything that can help me?" Cheetah turned away from Joker.

"Nope, not really." Joker finished laughing. "And even if I did I wouldn't help."

"Fine, I'll figure it out on my own." Cheetah walked back towards the door out of the room.

"Wait, before you go I've got a question." Joker hurried over to her.

"What is it?" Cheetah stopped in her tracks.

"Did you know that Black Manta was, well… Black."

"Yeah, of course I did. His name's David too. You really need to get to know people better, Joker."

Cheetah resumed walking and left Joker all alone in his room.

*******

Lex Luthor had yet to leave his own room. He was still testing out Cheetah's abilities. So far, all he'd managed to do was tear two of his pillows to shreds.

"Hmm… I think I'm already getting used to this." Lex looked down at his claws.

His newly enhanced ears picked up on someone approaching his door from the outside. He turned around just as the door opened up and Star Sapphire stepped inside.

"Luthor, we need to talk." Star Sapphire went up to him.

"Ah, Carol. I take it you're not fond of my body." Luthor smirked at Star Sapphire.

"No, not one bit. I had actual power in my old one. This, this is useless." Star Sapphire looked down at herself.

"Ha, nonsense. I've trained my body to perfection." Lex grabbed Star Sapphire by the arm and squeezed it.

"Don't touch me like that!" Star Sapphire pulled her arm away.

"Sorry, it's my body." Luthor said, putting his hand in his pocket.

"Narcissist…" Star Sapphire whispered under his breath. "So Luthor, I don't know if you've noticed but I rely on my powers to fight. I'm not trained to use your body."

"In that case my dear, you'd better start training." Luthor smiled. "Trust me, with my body at your disposal it should be easy. I lift weights daily."

"Stop inflating your ego. I don't know why I came to talk to you." Star Sapphire grimaced and turned back around. "You'd better fix this soon…"

"Tell me if you need any help training my Herculean body." Lex was aware that he was overdoing by this point but loved annoying Star Sapphire.

"Oh, Lex." Star Sapphire stopped walking and turned back to Luthor. "Wear something else. Your suit looks terrible on Cheetah."

Star Sapphire smirked and left Luthor alone in his room. Once alone again, Luthor looked at the mirror again and examined his suit.

"Ugh, she's right… This is terrible." Luthor realized. "Lex old boy, you've got a lot of things to fix. And it's not just the suit."


	3. Best Laid Plans

The Injustice League was on their third day since they switched bodies. They all had at least a mildly better understanding of the capabilities of their new bodies. But all of them would rather be back in their original bodies more than anything else.

Right now, Star Sapphire, still inhabiting Lex Luthor's body, was in her room and trying to get her full six hours of sleep. Unfortunately, forces beyond her control seemed to conspire against this plan of hers. Her restful sleep was interrupted by the sound of an electronic ringtone loudly going off.

"What… I don't have an alarm clock…"

Star Sapphire realized that the noise was coming from inside one of Lex's pocket. She reached into the jacket and pulled out Lex's mobile phone. The caller ID read "MG", something which Star Sapphire was confused by.

"Hmm… Didn't know we had cell service down here." Star Sapphire sat up in bed and answered the phone. "Um, hello?"

_"Lex, I can't find your Injustice League hideout."_ a woman's voice replied on the other line. _"Looks to me like you hid it too well. I need some directions"_

"Who… Who is this?" Star Sapphire got out of bed.

_"It's Mercy. Are you feeling okay?"_

"Oh, Mercy, of course…" Star Sapphire got out of bed, racking her brain trying to figure out who she was talking to. "Sorry, I just got out of bed."

_"Well, you'd better wake up. You've got a busy day ahead of you and I need to pick you up. So just tell me where you hid your new Injustice League clubhouse."_

"You need to take a dirt road and stop when it ends." Star Sapphire left the room as she did her best to recall how she got to the hideout in the first place. "There should be a sign that says Dead End… Get out of your car and walk straight ahead until you reach a clearing with a large boulder. If you're cleared for entry, state your name and it should open. If it's not, wait for me."

_"Are you feeling okay, Lex? You sound nervous. You're never nervous."_

"Perfectly fine. Goodbye." Star Sapphire hastily ended the call and shoved the phone into her pocket again. She hurried down the hallway and stopped in front of Luthor's room. Once she was there she knocked on the door with all her might until it opened.

Luthor seemed very upset about being woken up, he stood there in his monogrammed silk pajamas with an annoyed expression on his face.

"Those clothes still don't fit you." Star Sapphire immediately noticed.

"Did you wake me up to complain about my fashion sense or do you have something important to talk about." Lex yawned.

"I do have something important actually." Star Sapphire stepped into Lex's room. "I just got a call from a woman who called herself Mercy. Who the hell is she and why did she say she was coming over here?"

"Oh, Mercy Graves is my chauffeur. She's a long serving trusted assistant, don't worry about her." Luthor smiled as he guided Star Sapphire further into his room.

"I am worried, Luthor. She told me that you had a busy day ahead." Star Sapphire poked Luthor in the chest. "What exactly does that mean?"

"Oh, that's right. Back when the plan wasn't all messed up today was supposed to be our free day. After all, us supervillains need fun." Luthor recalled. "I have an interview and an important meeting scheduled for today."

"So I have to pretend to be you now?" Star Sapphire tried to get confirmation.

"Yes, that's what it looks like." the corners of Lex's mouth turned up, clearly amused by the situation. "Don't worry, we'll explain it to Mercy and I can give you some pointers in the car."

"Unbelievable…" Star Sapphire muttered. "How am I supposed to run a company?"

"Aren't you in charge of Ferris Aircraft?" Luthor pointed out.

"No, I'm _Star Sapphire_. _Carol Ferris_ is only my host. The only thing we have in common is our love for Hal Jordan." Star Sapphire stated.

"In that case, try seeing if you can access Carol's memories." Luthor grabbed Star Sapphire by the arm and started directing her towards his closet. "Now, we need you to look good. Pick out a new suit and take a shower."

"Shower? In your body? Is that okay with you?" Star Sapphire asked.

"We can't have the CEO of Lexcorp being unpresentable." Luthor smiled. "I'll go inform the others of this change in plans. They might have plans for today too actually…"

*******

News of the work Star Sapphire had to do in place of Luthor spread quickly within the League. Most of them appreciated Luthor essentially giving them a day off but they too wondered if they'd made any plans prior to the body-switch that they forgot about.

In Black Manta's room, he had not left all day. He had preoccupied himself trying to figure out how to work his mirror gun. So far, he'd succeeded in making a mirror-clone of a chair but other than that his gun didn't seem to do much.

"Where did he even get this thing?" Black Manta muttered.

_"Manta! We got a problem!"_ a voice outside which Black Manta recognized as Star Sapphire's shouted. Of course, that meant it was really Mirror Master there.

"Open the door, it's not locked." Black Manta holstered his mirror gun.

The door opened up and Mirror Master stepped in. "I got us some bad news. Me 'n the Rogues were planning a big heist today. I said I'd do it since today was the off-day Luthor gave us."

"Who are the Rogues?" Black Manta asked.

"The greatest enemies of the Flash, that's who." Mirror Master stated.

"You're friends with Gorilla Grodd?" Black Manta smirked.

"Shuddup!" Mirror Master grabbed Manta by the shoulders. "Lissen, I need you and me to head down to Central City and help them out."

"I still don't know how to use this thing." Black Manta took out the mirror gun and waved it around a little.

"Doesn't matter! The job has to go down today and they need me for it. So you're goin' with me. I'll try to help out along the way." the gem on Mirror Master's head started to glow and both him and Manta were encased in pink light. Mirror Master began walking away and the light dragged Black Manta behind him.

"This is unnecessary! I was going to go with you!" Black Manta protested.

"Never can be too careful." Mirror Master replied. "Plus it's fun to mess around with these powers. Now c'mon, let's go. It's gonna be difficult to explain all of this to the boys..."

*******

Cheetah had no plans for the rest of the day and with everyone else leaving she thought it would be nice to have some time to herself. She'd gone to the kitchen to scrounge up what little food was in the hideout.

"Hmmm… What did Luthor stock for us." Cheetah was reaching for the refrigerator handle when she became distracted by a strange sounded. It sounded like muffled carnival music was coming from nearby. Then she realized there were vibrations in her pocket. "Huh, Joker has a phone…"

She reached into her pocket and took out the phone. The caller ID said "Harley", which gave Cheetah an idea of who was calling. Not sure what else to do, Cheetah answered the phone and put it up to her ear. "Um, hello?"

_"Hey Mistah J! How's it hangin' with your big bad villain friends?"_

Cheetah was caught off guard by being suddenly thrust into a conversation with Harley Quinn. After a couple seconds of silence, she responded.

"Oh, just fine, er, darling. Everything's fine."

_"Wonderful! When are you comin' over here? I got all kinds of special surprises ready for you."_

"Harley, I'm a busy woman- Er, busy man. And I don't have time for this." Cheetah started leaving the kitchen, hoping that the Joker himself could clear all of this up.

_"But ya promised you'd take me out today. Remember?"_

"Oh, yes, yes, of course. So sorry, my dear. I'll be up in Gotham before you know it."

_"Gee, thanks Puddin'. You're-"_

Cheetah hung up before Harley could get another word in. She madly searched through the halls of the hideout until she spotted the Joker walking down the hallway with Black Manta's helmet back on his head.

"Hey, Joker! Get over here!" Cheetah yelled.

Joker stopped in place and pivoted around on his heels. "Ah, Cheetah, how are things?"

"I don't have time to chat. I need you to explain why I just got a call from your girlfriend saying you promised to take her on a date." Cheetah snarled.

"Oh, that, yes… Almost forgot about it." Joker chuckled. "Well, good luck with that!"

He turned around and started walking away. Not one to be defeated, Cheetah ran in front of Joker and stood in his path.

"We're not done." Cheetah put her hands on her hips. "You're going to Gotham City with me and explaining to her what happened to us."

"Hmm, why should I?" Joker smirked under the helmet. "You're the one with my body."

"Because if you don't, I'll break you up with Harley."

"Good, it's about time."

"Fine, different tactic… I'll destroy your supply of Joker Toxin."

"You wouldn't dare!" Joker yelled.

"I would. So you're coming with me and talking to that bubbly blonde clown of yours." Cheetah grabbed Joker's wrist and began leading him away.

"Ugh! Can't a man get any personal time anymore…"

*******

Above ground, Lex Luthor and Star Sapphire were getting their first fresh air and sunlight in days. They stood around in front of the secret entrance to their hideout waiting for Lex Luthor's associate to shut up.

"This woman who's meeting us… What's her name again?" Star Sapphire asked.

"Mercy Graves, and you don't have to worry about her. She's very close, knows the innerworkings of Lexcorp almost as well as I do." Luthor proudly smiled.

"She had better get here soon." Star Sapphire frowned. "I hate waiting. If I had my powers I'd be flying there right now."

The sound of leaves being crushed and snapping twigs became audible to Luthor. He grabbed Star Sapphire by the shoulder.

"Quiet, I think she's here."

Out from the bushes stepped Mercy Graves, looking dishevelled and annoyed. She straightened out her hat and got closer to both of them.

"There you are, Lex. Come on we need to hurry." Mercy stopped moving when she saw Cheetah, or rather who she thought was Cheetah. "Why's Cheetah here? We can't have that kind of attention. And why is she in one of your suits?"

"Mercy, you may want to sit down for this." Luthor took a few steps closer. "_I_ am Lex Luthor. And the man who you think is me…" he pointed to Star Sapphire. "_That_ is Star Sapphire."

Mercy was confused by these statements. She scrunched up her face and looked back and forth between the two of them. "Um… What?"

"I'll explain in the car. It will all make sense in time." Lex walked past Mercy and beckoned for her and Star Sapphire to follow.

"Well… She sure talks like Lex." Mercy hurried after Luthor with Star Sapphire trailing behind the both of them.

By the time they made it out of the woods and into Luthor's car, Lex had given Mercy an abridged version of what had happened to them.

"Well, it sounds weird… But I've heard weirder." Mercy got into the driver's seat. "So does this mean I should cancel your meetings?"

"Not at all." Luthor made care to shift his new tail to the side as he sat down. "Carol here will be taking my place. Meanwhile, Mercy, you will be helping me with research on how to reverse this."

"Oh, joy…" Star Sapphire rolled her eyes.

"Hmm, she'd better not mess this up." Mercy remarked. "As CEO, you're supposed to be busy. You've got an interview with a reporter, Jack Ryder. It's for a TV show he's doing. Oh, and you have to show up at a party Bruce Wayne is hosting. Only for long enough to shake some hands and get some photos taken."

"This is going to be a disaster…" Star Sapphire scowled and looked out the window.

"It's almost funny." Mercy smirked.

"Never show weakness. Lex Luthor is not a weak man." Luthor tried to advise Star Sapphire. "You are superior to everyone you meet. Just remember that and you should be fine."

"Is he always this much of an egomaniac?" Star Sapphire looked to Mercy.

"Absolutely. You get used to it after a while. It's almost charming." Mercy smiled.

*******

Deep down below, the other Injustice Leaguers were still busy with their own plans. Joker had been following Cheetah through the labyrinthine halls of their headquarters for a little while now. He'd rather be anywhere else. A carnival, a funeral, it didn't matter to him. But he was worried exactly what Cheetah would do to his reputation while in his body.

"This is all rather pointless, don't you think?" Joker tried to argue. "I mean, neither of us really care about Harley. Why can't we just stay here and let her be lonely?"

"I don't want her trying to have phone-sex with me. So the faster we clear this up for her, the better." Cheetah stepped through a large set of automatic doors. The arch above the doors had a sign reading "Teleporter Room".

"Fine, but I don't feel like sticking around for too long." Joker remarked. "Should've gotten rid of Harley years ago…"

"Just get in the teleporter." Cheetah goes up to a computer terminal and types in some coordinates.

"Alright, fine." Joker stepped on to the teleportation pad in the middle of the room. "I don't like being ordered around, you know."

"Well, get used to it. I'm not a pushover like your girlfriend." Cheetah stood next to Joker on the pad. "I'm sending us to the teleporter Luthor had installed in your home. You had better be quiet. I'm not sure how much of your nonsense I can stomach."

The teleporter started making an electronic humming noise and the lights became brighter. Slowly, the lights got bright enough to be blinding and forced both Joker and Cheetah to close their eyes. When they opened their eyes again the lights were gone and the scenery had changed. They were still on a teleporter but the room they were in was much smaller and made entirely out of concrete.

"Ugh, what's that smell?" Cheetah shielded her nose with her hand "It's… Musty."

"Smells like home, that's what!" Joker cheered.

Joker stepped down from the teleportation pad and went over to the door. Cheetah lagged behind him, uncomfortable with her knee surroundings.

"Oh Harley, daddy's home!" Joker threw open the door and entered his hideout proper.

"Don't call yourself daddy…" Cheetah cringed, finally catching up to him.

"Hmm, Harley likes it. Especially in bed."

"Please don't tell me about what goes on in your bedroom. I don't want to know."

"Ha! Says the furry."

"The what?"

The increasingly childish conversation was cut short when they heard a series of clanks coming from somewhere in front of them.

"Is that your girl?" Cheetah whispered to Joker.

"Uh huh… For someone so acrobatic she's a real klutz around the house." Joker mumbled.

Their attention became focused again when Harley ran on to the scene towards the two of them. She was dressed in her jester hat and domino mask with only a skimpy nightie covering her body.

"Mistah J, here I…" Harley stopped when she saw the both of them. "Uh… Puddin', you didn't say nothin' about bringin' guests over."

"Look, Quinn, I need you to pay attention for a moment." Cheetah calmly got closer to her. "Because what I'm about to say is going to sound insane."

"Did you just call me Quinn? You never do that." Harley raised an eyebrow. "Are you okay?"

"Oh, this is comedy gold…" Joker chuckled, trying to keep quiet.

"What did he say?" Harley looked over at who she thought was Black Manta.

"Harley, have you seen the movie Freaky Friday?" Cheetah asked.

"Yeah. What's that gotta do with all of this though?"

"Well, thanks to Lex Luthor being an idiot, your Mister J is stuck inside the body of Black Manta." Cheetah pointed over at Joker. "And _I'm_ stuck in _his_ body."

"Uh huh…" Harley was having trouble accepting what had just been said but just nodded along to it. "Who are you?"

_"Cheetah."_

Okay… I think I need to sit down now…"

*******

There was one pair who had yet to leave the Injustice League's underground lair. But they were in the bathroom together at Mirror Master's request.

"Is it absolutely necessary to go?" Black Manta asked. "Can't you just take the gun with you?"

"Oh yeah, like that wouldn't look bloody suspicious." Mirror Master laughed. "Yeah, Star Sapphire's helpin' out the Rogues. She doesn't do that, she has bigger ambitions than that. People think you're me, so you have ta be the one there! Don't worry, I'll be right there with you."

"Fine, fine, I'll do it." Black Manta took the mirror gun off his belt. "Maybe I'll know what's happening this time."

Black Manta shot the gun at the bathroom mirror, causing it to ripple just as it had before. He got ready to jump through the mirror when a thought crossed his mind.

"How will we get to Central City from here?" Black Manta asked.

"Don't worry, I know my way around a mirror." Mirror Master cracked his knuckles. "I've got you."

The gem in his forehead started to glow and made both him and Black Manta begin to levitate. He floated his towards the water-like mirror with Black Manta being dragged behind him.

"Not this again!" Black Manta yelled. "This is no way to treat Aquaman's greatest foe!"

"That's funny, I don't see Ocean Master around here." Mirror Master snickered as he went through the mirror.

Black Manta and Mirror Master went through the mirror and entered the mirror world. Floating around like this disoriented even further than he already was. Listening closely, he picked up on distant echoes. It sounded almost like he could hear the conversations people on the other side of the mirrors around him were having.

Eventually, Black Manta stopped paying attention. He felt absolutely helpless in this unfamiliar world. When he got out of this situation he had half a mind to slug Mirror Master in the jaw.

"Ereht tsomla er'ew!" Mirror Master yelled at one point.

The distorted echoing quality of the backwards words made Black Manta put his hands over his ears. His discomfort made Mirror Master laugh.

After just a couple more seconds Black Manta and Mirror Master exited out a large mirror resting on the ground. Mirror Master's gem stopped glowing making him and Black Manta land on the ground.

Black Manta got a better view of his surroundings. He was in some type of abandoned building. That was normal for most street level supervillain hideouts. He looked up and saw four other people standing around him. Captain Cold, Weather Wizard, Heatwave, and the Trickster.

"Well, it's about time you got here, Evan." Captain Cold said. "We've been waiting a while you know."

"Who's your little friend? She's kinda cute." Trickster reached a hand down to help up Mirror Master (Although to him it was a complete stranger).

"Shut up, Axel. That's Star Sapphire." Weather Wizard told him.

"Star Sapphire? Why the hell is she here? And why is she dressed up like Evan?" Heatwave asked.

"Boys, we got some explaining to do. How 'bout we open up some cold beers?" Mirror Master picked himself up off the ground.

"What's going on here?" Trickster looked to the older rogues for some guidance.

"I have no goddamn idea." Captain Cold admitted, taking a cautious step away.

"I'll give you the short version… _That_ is Mirror Master." Black Manta pointed over to Mirror Master while getting up. "And me, I'm Black Manta."

"Yeah, we're definitely gonna need those beers." Mirror Master smiled, amused by the confused expressions of his fellow Rogues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope this chapter wasn't too boring, it was mostly setup. The next three chapters are going to be focused on the three respective stories set up here. So that's one chapter for Lex and Sapphire, one chapter for Joker and Cheetah, and one chapter for Black Manta and Mirror Master.


	4. The Corporate Ladder

The underground Lexcorp parking garage had a spot reserved exclusively for Lex Luthor. To the confusion of most of the other employees, the reserved parking space was actually one of the farthest places in the garage from the elevators or stairs. But what they didn't know was that it was right next to one of the entrances to Luthor's underground research facility.

Mercy Graves parked the limo in the parking spot and glanced back at Star Sapphire and Luthor. She was still having trouble accepting the strange situation that had been set out before her. But she had no choice but to accept it.

"Alright, here we are." Mercy looked to her boss. "What's the plan here, Lex?"

"You and me go underground and research how to get me back into my body. Carol will carry out my routine today and hopefully not mess it up." Lex replied.

"Hold on, I need your assistant." Star Sapphire said. "I don't know anything about this company or how it works."

"I have other employees. Go to my office and ask for Ms. Teschmacher, she should be able to help you with anything you need." Luthor gave instructions. "She does not know I'm a supervillain. So just keep that quiet around here. Now get up there and do my job!"

"Alright, fine. No need to be so pushy." Star Sapphire opened up the door to the limo and stepped out, leaving Mercy and Lex by themselves.

"So…" Mercy looked over her boss some more. "What exactly do you plan to do?"

"I have a plan, I just don't know what it is yet." Luthor began to open up his door. "Come on now Mercy, let's get downstairs. I have a lot of notes to search through."

Mercy nodded as she and Luthor exited the car together. Once out of the car, Mercy opened up the hidden door in the wall which led down a long metal hallway that led deep below the Lexcorp building.

Both of them went down the hall with the door closing automatically behind them. For a while, nobody said anything. But soon, Mercy had too many questions to keep silent about.

"So Lex… What's it like being in a cat's body?" Mercy asked.

"Not fun. All this fur… It's uncomfortable. Not to mention the tail has a mind of its own." Luthor replied. "But at least I don't have fleas. Clearly, Cheetah knows how to take care of her body."

"Hmm, how exactly did you end up in there again?"

"I don't want to think about it anymore…"

"Fine… Hey, so, do you think Sapphire knows what she's doing?"

"Oh, absolutely not."

"And is she going to mess things up?"

"Without a doubt. Nothing a good PR campaign can't fix."

*******

Star Sapphire stepped out of the elevator and on to the top floor of the Lexcorp tower. Which turned out to be entirely Lex Luthor's office. She had to admit, it was a very nice space. The all-glass walls weren't her style but everything else seemed very well done.

Remembering Lex's advice, Star Sapphire hurried over to Luthor's desk. Everything was so spaced apart in this room that it took much longer than anticipated. Once at the desk, Star Sapphire pressed a button that, judging by the label on it, was meant to call Luthor's secretary.

"Excuse me, I'd like to see Ms. Teschmacher in my office."

_"Er, I'm Ms. Teschmacher."_

"Oh… Good. I was testing you. So get in here right now."

_"Right away Mr. Luthor."_

Star Sapphire sat down in Luthor's chair and tried to look calm. She crossed her legs while she waited for her secretary to arrive. During the long trip to the office, Star Sapphire had calmed down a lot. She told herself that things could only get better from here. Her alter ego ran a company, so why couldn't she?

The doors to the elevator slowly parted and out stepped a young woman in business attire. Immediately, Star Sapphire took notice and stared at the newcomer.

"Hello there Mr. Luthor, what did you need me for?" the woman asked.

"Ms. Teschmacher, right? Good to see you. I need help." Star Sapphire smiled. "My usual assistant is sick and I need someone else to help me today."

"Oh, of course. It's an honour to work with you." Ms. Teschmacher nodded. "What do you need exactly?"

"I had some kind of interview today. Do you know when it is?"

"With Jack Ryder? The guy from Gotham? It should start in about five minutes."

Panic struck Star Sapphire and she shot up from her desk.

"Then what are we standing around for? Take me too him right now."

"I- I don't know where that is, sir."

"Neither do I! So, er, help me out here."

"Right away. Uh, I think Ms. Graves said something about that appointment being on the tenth floor. Let's try there."

"Good, you lead the way." Star Sapphire went over to Ms. Teschmacher and pointed over to the elevator.

"Yes sir, I won't let you down." Ms. Teschmacher took Star Sapphire by the hand and began leading her towards the elevator.

"Let go of me."

"Oh, sorry, right away." Ms. Teschmacher let go of Star Sapphire's hand as they made it into the elevator together.

"Thank you. Maybe there's a raise in this for you." Star Sapphire turned around as she pressed the button that led to the tenth floor. She was really enjoying getting in character.

"Oh, why thank you Mr. Luthor."

*******

In the part of Lexcorp only a select few knew about, Lex Luthor and Mercy Graves had arrived at the central control centre. It was a bit of a mess, there was machinery strewn about the room. But fortunately, Lex knew where everything was. He was the one who made the mess after all.

"Ah, so good to be home." Luthor sighed. "Don't you agree, Mercy?"

"I guess so…" Mercy muttered.

"Is there a problem?"

"I just can't get used to your voice coming out of Cheetah's body."

"Oh trust me, I'm not used to it too. It's a real out of body experience."

"Was that a joke?" Mercy inquired.

"No, I didn't mean it to be…" Luthor muttered as he got closer to one of the computers. "Mercy, I need you to do me a favour."

"What is it, Lex?" Mercy got closer to him.

"Get me some clothes that fit me. I'm tired of my associates making fun of these ill-fitting suits?"

"Where am I supposed to find you clothes?" Mercy asked. "It's not like you built an Ambercrombie and Fitch down here."

"Figure it out." Luthor got closer to the flower pot and waved Mercy away from him. "I have work to do."

"Fine, fine, I'll be back with clothes." Mercy turned around. "I think I keep some spare clothes down here…"

"Find whatever you can. It doesn't matter. I just want something that looks good on me." Luthor provided the computer in front of him with his full attention. "Medusa Mask… What do I have on file about that?"

Mercy could tell that Lex had stopped paying her notice now and went further into the underground facility. She mentally recited the layout of the place to herself as she began her search.

*******

The elevator opened up to the tenth floor and Star Sapphire stepped out with Ms. Teschmacher behind him. She looked up and down the hall like she owned the building. Naturally, she had no idea where she was or where anything was supposed to be.

"Ms. Teschmacher," Star Sapphire looked to Luthor's assistant.

"Yes Mr. Luthor, sir?" Ms. Teschmacher asked.

"Find me where Jack Ryder has his interview set up."

"Why can't you ask?"

"The CEO can't ask where things are like. It's a bad look."

"But why don't you know?"

"Uh, it's a big building. Just go ask around." Star Sapphire patted Ms. Teschmacher on the back as if to signal that she should move. As much as she hated to admit it, Star Sapphire was really enjoying the life of a corporate scumbag.

Ms. Teschmacher got the message and went to go speak to someone about where Jack Ryder was. Star Sapphire leaned against the wall and watched as Ms. Teschmacher talked to another employee. Their interaction was quick to end and she hurried back to who she thought was her boss.

"Mr. Ryder's film crew is set up in the conference room just down the hall from here." Ms. Teschmacher grabbed Star Sapphire by the wrist and started to lead her down the hall. She suddenly let go and looked back. "Oh, sorry, sorry, you don't like that."

"It's fine. Let's just get there now."

"Of course."

Eventually, they came to the room that they'd been directed to. Ms. Teschmacher, still thinking about the raise that had been teased, eagerly opened up the door for Star Sapphire.

"Thank you Ms. Teschmacher. You wait out here until the interview is over. And how about you bring me a coffee?" Star Sapphire entered the room while Ms. Teschmacher nodded.

The door closed behind her and Star Sapphire noticed the camera crew set up in the room. At the centre of everything was Gotham City journalist and media personality Jack Ryder.

"Ah, Mr. Luthor. We were just about to call you. You're late." Ryder grinned.

"Maybe you were just early?" Star Sapphire did her best to imitate the smug smile she'd seen on Luthor's face many times before.

"Haha, you're funny Mr. Luthor." Ryder pretender to be amused. "Why don't you take a seat? It's not often you let yourself be interviewed like this."

"Well, everyone deserves to know a thing or two about me." Star Sapphire sat down in front of Ryder. "Are the cameras rolling?"

"Yes they are. Let's start." Ryder nodded. "Mr. Luthor, your company has been involved in a number of controversies over the years."

For a moment, Star Sapphire was surprised. This interview already seemed harder than she thought it would be. She took a deep breath and prepared to avoid questions and insult the reporter.

"You know, Ryder, I don't like this hostile line of questioning."

"With all do respect, it's a valid question. Just answer it..."

"Of course…"

*******

Luthor was still hunched over his computer, looking over everything he knew about the artifact that got him in the mess he was currently in. No matter what he did he felt like he hadn't learned enough. The dim light of the computer in the dark room was beginning to hurt his eyes but he ignored it.

Eventually, Luthor was snapped out of his trance by the lights above him turning on.

"Jesus Lex, turn the lights on." Mercy groaned from behind him.

Luthor turned around and saw Mercy coming towards him with some clothes held under her arm. He smiled at her return.

"Ah, Mercy. I can always count on you." Luthor approached Mercy and took the clothes from her.

"It's only another uniform. Hope that's okay."

"Yes, yes, it's fine. As long as it fits me. All day I've been feeling like a kid in his father's suit."

Casually, Luthor began to take off his badly fitted suit much to the distress of Mercy.

"What the hell are you doing!?" Mercy yelled. "You can't just take off your clothes in front of me."

"Please, with Cheetah you can hardly tell she's even naked." Luthor rolled his eyes. "Besides, it'll only be for a moment."

"Sometimes I think I don't get paid enough for this…" Mercy turned away from her boss. "Look, did you find anything with your research?"

"Yes I did." Luthor got the last of his suit off and began changing into the uniform Mercy provided for him. "I purchased the Medusa Mask from a man named Felix Faust. You've heard of him, haven't you?"

"I think so. He's a little creepy from what I remember."

"Well, before Faust the mask belonged to a man named Roger Hayden. He was the emotion manipulating super-criminal Psycho-Pirate. Unfortunately, I've hit a dead end now. Apparently, something in the Medusa Mask makes it return to its owner under special circumstances."

"So if you find Psycho-Pirate you find the Mask. Which means you get your body back."

"Precisely. You can turn around now. I'm dressed."

Mercy looked back behind her and saw that Luthor-in-Cheetah was now dressed identically to her. It wasn't an exact fit but was much better fitting than the suit he had on before.

"How do I look?" asked Luthor.

"Fine, I guess." Mercy remarked.

"It feels weird to be wearing women's clothing…"

"Well, you are a woman right now. Or at least in the body of a woman."

"I need to get back to work." Luthor turned back to the computer. "Mercy, help me out here. Find out everything you can about Psycho-Pirate…"

*******

All the way up on the tenth floor, Star Sapphire had not been doing so well with her interview. From what she could remember about being Carol Ferris, these weren't the type of questions she was typically asked. Clearly, Luthor had not been as good at hiding his criminal activities as he claimed because a lot of Jack Ryder's questions involved "Suspicious Activities" going on at Lexcorp. Of course, Star Sapphire had no idea what the specifics were so she just did her best to avoid the questions.

She sat there being interviewed for what felt like forever, her suit growing uncomfortable as she got sweatier. Eventually, Star Sapphire heard the words she'd been waiting for since the interview started.

"Alright Mr. Luthor, I think we're done here."

"Thank you." Star Sapphire realized she might have sounded too relieved but didn't care. "Well, it was a pleasure talking to you, Ryder. Let's do this again sometime."

"Of course, a pleasure." Ryder watched as Star Sapphire got out from her chair and walked out of the room. "I think this will make for very interesting television, Mr. Luthor."

Star Sapphire ignored him as she left the board room and was greeted by Ms. Teschmacher on the otherside. Just as she'd requested, Ms. Teschmacher had two cups of coffee with her.

"Here you go, sir. I got you a coffee." she held out the coffee. "One for me too."

"Thank you, you're really earning that raise." Star Sapphire accepted the cup. "What's next on the agenda?"

"You have an appearance you're supposed to make at an event hosted by Bruce Wayne." Ms. Teschmacher informed her.

"Oh, wonderful… Take me there." Star Sapphire told her.

"Don't you know where it is?"

"Are you questioning your boss?"

"Absolutely not, Mr. Luthor. I'll take you there."

"Excellent." Star Sapphire sipped her coffee and realized she didn't actually like it very much. She kept drinking it anyway. Luthor said to never look weak and that was just exactly what she was going to do.

"Am I… Am I invited to the party?" Ms. Teschmacher sounded hopeful.

"I'm sure they'll let me have a plus one." Star Sapphire nodded.

*******

Many, many, floors beneath Star Sapphire, Lex Luthor and Mercy Graves were busy looking through computer files for anything they had on the man who called himself Psycho-Pirate. Luthor had been having trouble focusing on his work, something about the new clothes he was wearing felt weird.

Maybe it was because he knew they belonged to Mercy or maybe it was because they were made for a woman. Either way, he tried to ignore it. He'd begun blocking out most of the world around him a while ago. But he was suddenly brought back to reality when he heard Mercy's voice.

"Lex! I found something over here!"

"What?!" Luthor took a brisk walk across the room over to Mercy who was behind another computer. "Tell me what you found."

"Right here…" Mercy pointed at the screen. "It was hard to access but I've found multiple reports about Roger Hayden being treated at a little place called Arkham Asylum."

"Oh god damn it…"

"What's the matter?"

"I'm going to have to organize a prison break." Luthor groaned. "It's always such a hassle to do that."

"Well, I'll be sure to help out in any way I can." Mercy smirked. "I think I can handle a prison break."

"There's just one thing I'm worried about…"

"What is it?"

"I just don't know if we can trust Hayden. He'll probably be upset about me having the Mask in the first place."

"Well, if talking doesn't work you can always intimidate him."

"Yes, I suppose so…" Luthor nodded. "Mercy, I'm done here. If I've got my timing right, Sapphire is just getting to Wayne's party. I don't want her hanging around there for too long and messing things. Bring the car around and pick her up."

"I'll get right on it."

*******

Downtown on top of a large apartment building Star Sapphire and Ms. Teschmacher had just arrived. There was a large crowd of people gathered and Star Sapphire was already enjoying herself. She got herself a drink from the bar. It may have been early but she definitely felt like alcohol was necessary if she wanted to get through the day.

"How's your drink, sir?" Ms. Teschmacher asked.

"Fine." Star Sapphire took a small sip of her martini. "I just want to say hello to Wayne and then we can try and leave."

"Oh, wow. As in Bruce Wayne?" Ms. Teschmacher smiled. "I've always wanted to meet him."  
"Please, Mr. Wayne is nothing but a foppish playboy. On an average day, he spends half his time in bed with a swimsuit model and spends the other half in his gym or pretending he knows how to run a company." Star Sapphire was a little proud of how Luthor-like she made herself sound. "But sometimes you need to fake friendliness in this business."

"I think there's a pool on this roof. He might be over there." Ms. Teschmacher suggested.

Star Sapphire had no idea where anything was and just decided to follow the advice of her assistant across the crowd of people and over to the swimming pool. As expected, Bruce Wayne was lounging in the pool with one woman on each shoulder. He immediately took notice of Luthor.

"Ah, Lex, so good to see you again." Bruce smiled.

"Yes, yes, just fine." Star Sapphire reached a hand out to shake a hand with the billionaire.

Bruce saw this shook Sapphire's hand, smiling.

"You seem tense, Lex. Maybe you should have a drink."

"No thank you, I just had one." Star Sapphire pulled her hand away. "You have a very strong grip… Muscular physique. Almost as good as me. I must get the name of your trainer."

She rubbed her hand. Whether he knew it or not, Wayne had a hard grip and her hand was now sore.

"I'm mostly self trained actually. Not too serious about being an athlete. But if I want to blow off some steam I sometimes go down to Wildcat's Gym."

"Fascinating…" Star Sapphire finished rubbing her hand. "Well, I really must be going now."

"Please, sit down. We've got plenty of time to talk." Bruce gestured to a spot next to him to sit.

"I said I need to leave!" Star Sapphire had begun to lose her cool. She was getting tired of her "Luthor" charade and wanted to go back to being herself again. Noting the confused look in Wayne's face, Star Sapphire turned around and pushed into the crowd with Ms. Teschmacher right behind her.

"Sir, are you feeling okay?" Ms. Teschmacher asked. "You sounded nervous."

"I'm not nervous. Lex Luthor is never nervous." Star Sapphire was only half paying attention to her assistant. "I just hate having to pretend."

"What's that mean?"

"Nothing, nothing at all."

Star Sapphire looked through the crowd of people and walked around. She had no idea what she was supposed to be doing there but decided to just be at the party until she felt like she had no choice but to leave. After pushing through the party for a couple minutes, with Ms. Teschmacher struggling to keep pace, until she spotted someone else she recognized; Mercy Graves. Somewhat relieved, Star Sapphire hurried over to Mercy.

"Oh thank god, I don't know how much longer I can fake this." Star Sapphire put a hand on Mercy's shoulder. "I really need to spend less time in space."

Ms. Teschmacher caught up with them and noticed Mercy. "Hey, Mr. Luthor… Didn't you say she was sick today?"

"I was misinformed." Star Sapphire was quick to say. "Ms. Teschmacher, you can take the rest of the day off."

"I can? Oh, thank you." Ms. Teschmacher smiled.

"Let's get out of here…" Star Sapphire whispered to Mercy.

"Right away." Mercy nodded and grabbed Star Sapphire by the wrist and led her towards the exit.

About ten minutes later, Star Sapphire had been guided into the back of a limo where Lex Luthor was waiting for her. Mercy Graves got in the front of the car and began to drive away.

"So, how did it go?" Lex Luthor asked. He was sitting with his legs crossed, very aware of how short his brand new skirt is.

"Probably not very well. I promsied your other assistant a raise. You may want to give your PR department a call." Star Sapphire scowled. "Nice dress by the way."

"I don't care if you're sarcastic or not, it's much more comfortable than the suit." Luthor stated. "But, I do have some good news from this whole affair."

"What is it?"

"I know how we might get our bodies back."

"Ah, excellent."

"Unfortunately, that means we're all going to have to break into Arkham Asylum."

"Well then… It looks like we're going to have to get Joker's expertise on this job."

"Don't worry. In the end, everything will be worth it."


	5. Visiting Gotham

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this chapter ended up being a lot shorter than the rest. Hope it isn't an issue. Quality over quantity and all that. Anyway, I'm aiming for the chapter after this to be longer. But you'll just have to wait a couple of days to know for certain.

In eastern Gotham City, there was a condemned apartment complex that was meant to be demolished several months ago. Of course, that was before the Joker took it over and turned it into a large hideout for him, Harley Quinn and their assorted henchmen.

In the basement of this crumbling wreck of an apartment, three people had decided to have a nice chat over a cup of coffee. Harley Quinn was having trouble believing the brain switching story Cheetah and Joker had given her. She'd heard of weird like that happening before, but in Gotham the weirdest it got was a criminal really committed to a gimmick. Their only super powered criminals were Clayface and Poison Ivy.

Harley sat down in a dusty armchair and sipped on a freshly poured mug of coffee. "Okay… Let's go over this again. You're Mistah J…" she pointed at Joker in Black Manta's body. "And you're that weird cheetah lady." she pointed at Cheetah in the Joker's body.

"Yes." Cheetah calmly nodded. "Do you finally understand?"

"I guess so…" Harley looked back and forth between them. "Gee, this sure ain't how I saw my day goin'."

"Ha! Well, neither did we." Joker giggled.

"I had so many plans for today…" Harley sighed. "Now what am I supposed to do?"

"Well, I'm still here, aren't I?" Joker pointed out.

"Yeah, but you're in another guy's body now. I can't get into that. Don't get me wrong, I like ya but your first body's also real nice."

Cheetah consciously moved away from Harley after hearing this. "You can't have this."

"Don't worry, I'm not stupid." Harley gulped down some more coffee. "I just ain't sure I'm into some faceless goon."

"Oh, don't worry, Manta's helmet comes off." Joker detached Black Manta's helmet and put his helmet down on the floor. "Ta-da! As you can see, I still have my winning smile!"

Harley stared at Joker's signature psychotic smile on Black Manta's face, she didn't know what to make of it.

"Uh… Well, it's interesting." Harley noticed.

"By the way, did you know that Manta was black? I feel like I'm the last person to find out."

"Yeah, yeah, I knew that. Think his name's Davey or somethin' too."

"Okay, so I _am_ the last person to find out. Why does nobody trust me?"

"Because you're a deranged lunatic who dresses like a clown." Cheetah dryly added.

"Oh, shut up, pussycat." Joker chuckled. "You shouldn't be the one lecturing people on sanity. What's your beef with Wonder Woman anyway? You know what, I don't actually care."

"How do you put up with this?" Cheetah looked to Harley.

"Ah, you get used to it." Harley said. "Mistah J's a big old teddy bear…" she reached over to grab the Joker only for her hand to be swatted away. "Ow!"

Cheetah had plenty more to complain about but made the decision to keep it to herself. Clearly, nothing she could say would get through to either of her companions right now. But after a couple of seconds of ignoring Joker and Harley chatting, an actual question popped into Cheetah's head.

"So are we going back to the hideout now?" asked Cheetah. "There's nothing here for us."

"Awww, but I wanted to spend some special time with my man…" Harley reached forward and grabbed on to Joker's arm. "Can't I get some of that before you go?"

"Fine, fine." Joker rolled his eyes. "This isn't really my body so I don't even care. Come on, let's go. Just a quick trip to the bedroom."

"Thank's a ton, Puddin'! I promise I'll be outta your hair soon and you can go get your body back." Harley got up from her chair and grabbed Joker by the arm. She led him out of the room and upstairs.

"Don't think about it… Just don't think about it…" Cheetah muttered to herself, trying her hardest not to imagine what the two clowns were going to get up to. She finished up her cup of coffee and put it to the side. "So… What else can I do around here while I wait."

For a moment, Cheetah's catlike instincts kicked in and she licked the back of her hand. "Blech! Bad idea… Okay Barbara, just keep yourself entertained somehow."

After a couple more minutes of doing pretty much nothing, Cheetah became distracted by the same faint carnival music she heard earlier that day.

"God damn it, stupid phone…" Cheetah took the phone out of the phone and answered it. For just a few seconds, she was shocked to hear her own voice on the other line.

_"Barbara, it's Lex. I've got some good news."_

"You know how to get our old bodies back?" Cheetah smiled.

_"Yes, actually. There's a patient in Arkham Asylum that knows everything we need. He calls himself Psycho-Pirate."_

"Arkham? You know, I'm in Gotham City right now. Funny."

_"What the hell are you doing in Gotham?"_

"Ugh, it's Joker's stupid girlfriend. She and him had plans for today and- Look, I don't want to talk about it."

_"Hmm, I don't care either. Look, stay where you are. Me, Mercy, and Carol are coming over to you. I'll get in contact with Evan and David."_

"Stop using our first names… It's starting to sound weird."

_"Good point. Look, the point is I'll be there later. So tell Joker not to go anywhere."_

"Of course. Alright, I'll talk to you later. Goodbye." Cheetah hung up and pocketed the phone. "Hmm, wonder if Joker would mind if I changed his ringtone. Besides, that carnival music is predictable even for him."

Cheetah leaned back in her chair, trying to keep her mind occupied somehow. She was filled with mind-numbing boredom right now and inside the body and house of an insane clown. If she wanted, she could have explored. But frankly, the idea just wan't appealing. Cheetah knew little of the Joker other than that he was creepy and unpredictable. So to her, the easiest way to keep safe was to stay still.

For a couple minutes longer, Cheetah remained in the basement. Occasionally, she looked around. But eventually, Joker came charging down the stairs with his helmet in his hand and his suit was put on very poorly.

"Ugh! That idiot!" Joker yelled to himself. "That- That stupid, selfish-"

"Oh come on, what happened this time?" Cheetah sighed, standing up and getting closer to Joker.

_"Puddin', puddin', please don't be mad!"_

Harley rushed down the stairs, now without her hat or mask on. She held her nightie in place to make sure she wasn't accidentally flashing Cheetah in her hurry. Once she was close enough she grabbed Joker by the shoulder.

"We can try again, I'm really sorry?"

"Can someone please explain what happened?" Cheetah repeated herself.

"Hmmph, Harley here apparently doesn't find me attractive." Joker pushed Harley away from him.

"That's not true, puddin'! I love your laugh and your personality and everything! But that your body you're in… It ain't my thing. Too muscular. I ain't into that. But your real body…" Harley's gaze shifted over to Cheetah.

"Nope!" Cheetah backed away. "You are not even touching me!"

"Now, now, play nice. It's better you than me." Joker smirked.

"I'm not doin' anything." Harley held her hands up. "Thinkin' about it, but it just ain't the same if the real Mistah J ain't in control."

"Thank god…" Cheetah sighed and sat back down. "You people freak me out."

"Ha! Thank you!" Joker cackled.

Cheetah got up from the chair and approached the two of them. "Look, Joker, I have something serious to talk about."

"If you want serious, you're talking to the wrong man." Joker giggled.

"Lex and Sapphire are on the way." Cheetah told him, sounding a little angry. "They told me we need to go to Arkham Asylum."

"Ah yes, Arkham. My home away from home!" Joker cheered. "I know all the best ways of getting in and out of the old bughouse."

"Hmm, maybe you'll finally be useful for something."

"Hey! My puddin' is great and you should respect him." Harley went in to hug the Joker but got pushed away again.

"Shut up you useless whore!"

"Oh, you got the cutest pet names for me."

"Christ, your life is depressing." Cheetah muttered under her breath. She cleared her throat and raised her voice. "Listen, I don't have time for this crap anymore. Lex Luthor is coming in here and he wants us to do something very important. So make it look less like you just tried to have sex."

"Hmmph, fine." Joker zipped up his suit and popped on Black Manta's helmet. "Harley, go make yourself presentable. I don't want Lexy seeing your goodies."

"Yes Mistah J." Harley quickly nodded and rushed out of the basement. Presumably, to go change into something.

"When did Luthor say he was coming over." Joker straightened out Black Manta's suit one last time.

"You know, I don't actually remember." Cheetah tapped her chin.

"Oh well, probably not important." Joker shrugged.

Quite literally the moment after Joker's mouth closed they all heard the familiar sound of a teleporter being used.

"Hmmph, how did Lex talk me into installing that thing?" Joker groaned. "I'll need to destroy it once all of this is over."

Cheetah and Joker walked across the room and entered the area where the teleporter was set up. They saw Lex Luthor, Mercy Graves, and Star Sapphire standing on the teleporter pad.

"Ah, glad we could have a welcoming committee." Luthor smiled.

"Ugh, what is that smell? Mold?" Sapphire asked.

"I dunno. You get used to it though." Joker laughed.

Cheetah noticed that Luthor was dressed up exactly like Mercy. It wasn't that she disliked it, in fact it looked pretty good on her body. She just had no idea why Lex was dressed up like that.

"Luthor, why are you dressed up like your chauffeur?"

"I needed something to change into and it was all that was available." Luthor pushed down his skirt some more. "I still don't like having my legs this exposed but it'll have to do."

"It's a good look." Cheetah smirked. "I might steal it when I get my body back."

"They're my clothes, don't do it." Mercy glared at her. "Lex is giving them back when he's done."

"Enough with the banter!" Star Sapphire snapped. "Can we please go somewhere that doesn't smell like mildew?"

"Yes, I second that actually." Luthor agreed.

The newly formed group left the teleportation room and went back into the basement. Joker made a general hand motion over to the grouping of chairs around a small table.

"Please have a seat. Can I get you anything? Drinks? Snacks?"

"No thank you." Star Sapphire declined, sitting down.

"I haven't eaten in a while…" Luthor admitted as he took a seat. "Sure."

"Ah, got it." Joker looked over his shoulder and shouted up the stairs. "Harley! Get down here you idiot!"

After a couple seconds Harley came down the stairs. Her mask was crooked, she only had one shoe on, and her costume just looked generally wrinkled.

"Whatta you need Mistah J?" Harley asked.

"Get some food for our guests." Joker told her.

"But we barely got anything."

"I don't care, just do it!"

Harley nodded and rushed back up the stairs, trying to straighten out her costume as she ran. Once she was gone, Joker went back over to the others.

"She's a good kid, but she's also an idiot." Joker laughed.

"Lex, why is he on the team?" Star Sapphire whispered.

"Because I needed someone to counter Batman." Luthor whispered back.

"Well, it had better be worth it." Cheetah joined in on this interaction. "I've had to talk to him for hours now and it is not fun."

"Don't worry, once Mirror Master and Black Manta show up we can get a move on." Luthor said.


	6. Central City Stories

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this chapter is even shorter than the last one. Apparently, I had even less material to work with. Oh well, I just hope you all enjoyed it. Anyway, next chapter should have more content.

Black Manta had never really visited Central City before. His skill-set was oriented around underwater combat. Specifically, fighting Aquaman. And Central City most noteworthy body of water was a river and their local hero, the Flash, could run on water.

But yet, there he was. Sitting at a table in a large empty building with several of Central City's most infamous criminals.

"And that's 'bout when we switched bodies…" Mirror Master finished explaining. "Don't really understand why, but it's what happened."

"This is why I don't work with Luthor anymore. He's too unpredictable." Captain Cold stated.

"Who's the guy in your body again?" Trickster asked.

"I'm Black Manta. Wear a big helmet, I fight Aquaman." Black Manta stated.

"Oh right, you're that guy." Heat Wave recalled.

"So, do you know how to use the Mirror Gun?" Weather Wizard asked. "Because we need it to help infiltrate the museum."

"I've been tryin' to teach him, but the idiot doesn't seem to be takin' to it too well." Mirror Master said. "At least, the travellin' part. He's got the clonin' part down."

"So what you're saying is we can't do the heist?" Captain Cold asked.

"Why can't Mirror Master just take back his old gun." Trickster spoke up.

"I went over this with Manta." Mirror Master leaned forward on the table. "Y'see if we get spotted, which we will, it'll just raise more questions. Why the hell was Star Sapphire with the Rogues and why did she have Mirror Master's gun? See, people are gonny get suspicious."

"Alright, that makes sense." Trickster admitted. "So now what're we gonna do?"

"Hmm… I guess we kinda have to cancel the heist." Heat Wave remarked.

"No way, we've sunk too much time into this." Captain Cold stood up from his seat. "The heist has to go down today. This is the biggest score we'll have had in years."

"I dunno, they're showing off that thing in the museum 'til the end of the month." Heat Wave argued.

"But I calculated this. Today's the best day to do it, there will be the lowest attendance which means relaxed security and almost on chance of collateral damage." Captain Cold said. "Plus, if we wait too long someone else might snatch the score up. Do you really want Rainbow Raider to pull one over on us?"

"Please, that idiot couldn't rob a hot dog stand." Weather Wizard laughed. "And even if I am anxious to get on with the heist, we can't do it without Mirror Master."

"Fine, what if one of us just took Evan's gun?" Trickster suggested.

"Hmm… Interestin' idea." Mirror Master chuckled. He paused and looked around the table. "Anyone know how to use it?"

The table fell silent. Everyone looked at each other, hoping someone else would reply. Mirror Master just sat there with a smug, satisfied smile on his face. He leaned back and put his legs up on the table.

"Y'see, that's what I thought." Mirror Master laughed some more.

"Alright people, here's the plan. Everyone but Mirror Master and Manta meet up with me in the other room." Captain Cold said.

"Aw man, another meeting." Trickster complained. "Can't you just fill me in when it's done."

"Ugh, fine." Captain Cold sighed. "Mark, Mick, just talk to me for a second."

"Right…" Heat Wave got up from the table and was followed by Weather Wizard.

The three Rogues left the other three at the table while they went to go have a chat. For what felt like a while, Mirror Master, Black Manta, and Trickster were all quiet. Either not wanting to talk or not knowing what really to say. Eventually, Trickster started to look Mirror Master's new body up and down.

"So who're you stuck in again?" Trickster eventually asked.

"Star Sapphire, one of those lantern people." Mirror Master explained.

"Hmm, never heard of her. She is pretty hot though."

"Don't look at me like that. It's still old Evan McCulloch in control of her."

"Fair enough. But, have you, uh, you know, checked out your equipment yet?"

"I'd do it, but I'm too afraid of Sapphire turnin' my bones into jelly if she finds out."

"Can we please talk about something else?" Black Manta spoke up.

"Fair 'nuff." Mirror Master said. "What's on your mind, Davey?"

"Don't call me that." Black Manta growled. "Can we all please just-"

Black Manta stopped himself when he heard a muffled rock and roll guitar riff coming from somewhere near him.

"What the- Are you two hearing that?" asked Black Manta.

"Yeah, sounds like music." Trickster said.

"Oh, that's my ringtone. Sorry, must be in your pocket." Mirror Master said.

"This thing has pockets?" Black Manta felt around at the suit for wherever the phone was being kept.

"No, no, the, uh, one of the pouches in the belt." Mirror Master pointed to where he kept his phone.

"Got it." Black Manta took out the phone from the little pouch on his belt and answered this. "Hello, how did you get this number?"

_"Manta, it's Luthor. Where the hell are you?"_

"Luthor? One minute, let me put you on speakerphone." Black Manta put the phone on speakerphone and put it down on the table. "Alright Lex, what's going on here?"

_"Hold on, who do you have with you?"_

"Hello, Mirror Master here." Mirror Master waved at the phone. "Trickster's here too."

_"Ah, give my best regards to James."_

"No, no, I'm the other one." Trickster spoke up.

_"Oh… Hello Alex or whatever it was."_

"Axel…" Trickster corrected Luthor, sounding a little annoyed.

_"Like I said, whatever. Anyway, David, Evan, I have some important news for you all."_

"Oh really, what's that then?" Mirror Master asked.

_"I need the two of you down here right now. I'm in Gotham City."_

"Gotham City? The hell are you doing out there? It's like America's dumpster out there." Mirror Master laughed. This comment got Trickster to chuckle too.

_"Trust me, I don't like this city either. But a patient locked up in Arkham Asylum may hold the key to getting us back to our old bodies."_

"Finally, some good news." Black Manta smiled. "I can't wait to wash my hands of this whole affair."

"Awright, awright, we'll be there soon as we can." Mirror Master said. "See you later, Lex."

_"Good. Luthor out."_

Lex hung up from his side of the call, leaving the three men in silence yet again. With impeccable timing, Weather Wizard, Heat Wave, and Captain Cold left the door.

"Alright McCulloch, you're off the hook. But once you're back in your own body, we're doing the job." Captain Cold pointed a finger at him.

"Well, that's good news gents. 'Cause me 'n Manta have to go." Mirror Master stood up.

"Go? Where are you going?" Weather Wizard asked.

"Luthor gave us a call while you three were talkin'." Mirror Master explained. "Gotta pop over to Gotham City. Apparently he knows how to get our minds back in our bodies."

"Well, that's good for you." Heat Wave smiled. "We'll be waiting for you back here in Central if you wanna get back to the heist."

"Thanks gents, it's been a pleasure. But me 'n Davey here need to get out." Mirror Master began looking around the room for the nearest mirror.

"Hold on, I wanna come along with you guys." Trickster spoke up.

"You sure about that, kid?" Black Manta looked over at Trickster. "They make it look easy, but breaking into Arkham will be tough."

"Hmmph, trust me. I know a thing or two." Trickster proudly stood up. "And don't call me kid."

"Y'know what, the more the merrier. I'm sure Luthor will be happy to have you around." Mirror Master smirked and stood up. "I'll be seeing you all around. Manta, my gun."

"Right…" Black Manta took the mirror gun off his belt and handed it to Mirror Master.

"Now would one of you direct me to the nearest reflective surface?" Mirror Master looked around the room.

"Here, lemme help you out." Captian Cold pulled out his cold gun and fired it at the wall behind them, slowly creating a large patch of ice. "There you go, hope that's shiny enough for you."

"Oh yeah, should be fine." Mirror Master approached the sheen of ice and looked back at Trickster and Black Manta. "C'mon boys, let's go. Be careful, it might get a little nippy."

"I'm not gonna like this…" Black Manta mumbled to himself as he followed Mirror Master.

"I'm used to this by now." Trickster bragged. "Well, mostly. Point is, you should follow my lead."

"Both of you shuddup and get in the portal." Mirror Master shot off his mirror gun and it made the large ice patch ripple. "Follow me and you should be fine. One… Two… Three!"

Mirror Master leaped through the icy portal followed by an enthusiastic Trickster. Black Manta hesitated and looked at the portal.

"When this is all over, I'm staying underwater…" Black Manta closed his eyes and jumped through the portal. The moment he entered it felt like he jumped into a bathtub filled with ice water. He let out a shriek but it sounded just as distorted as anything else he would have said in the mirror world.

Trickster and Mirror Master laughed at his expence but their warped laughter just confused Black Manta more. It was then that Black Manta decided that the only way he would survive this place was to just turn off his brain and let the other two lead him. His feeling of helplessness made him boil with rage inside. He made a mental note to go on a rampage through Atlantis when he was done. That always helped him relieve anger.

This time, the journey felt shorter. Then again, Black Manta always could have been ignoring the bizarre reality he found himself in at the moment. But eventually it ended when Black Manta found himself stumbling out of what turned out to be a large mirror and on to the floor of what looked like a basement.

"Oh god… Where the hell are we?" Black Manta looked around and saw Trickster and Mirror Master standing over him.

"If I know what I'm doin', and I do, we should be in Gotham City." Mirror Master reached down a hand towards Black Manta.

"So where are the others?" Black Manta ignored him, scowled, and got up on his own.

They heard the sound of a door's rusty hinges swinging open. Black Manta looked in the direction first and saw his own body coming towards him.

"Ah, there you are!" Joker cheered. "Took you long enough."

He took notice of Trickster being with them.

"Who's the kid?"

"Name's Trickster. Who are you?" Trickster asked.

"You may not be able to tell right now, but I'm the Joker!" Joker announced. "And you're that punk who stole my gimmick."

"Heh- Hey! I stole this stuff from the first Trickster." Axel took a step back.

"Oh well, that's too bad." Joker shrugged. "Remind me to find that other fellow sometime."

The other three members of the Injustice League, followed by Harley Quinn and Mercy Graves, entered the room Mirror Master and Black Manta had ended up in.

"Ah, there you are." Luthor smiled at them. "It's about time. Come with me, we're going to break into Arkham Asylum."

"Isn't that s'posed to be difficult?" Trickster asked.

"I'm a certified genius. Nothing is difficult for me." Luthor smirked. "Now come with me. Now that you're all here, we have much to discuss..."


	7. Brainstorming

Locked deep in Arkham Asylum's maximum security ward was a man named Roger Hayden. Previously, Roger pranced around in a colourful red and black costume and caused quite a bit of trouble, to put it mildly. He wasn't exactly a Gotham regular like most of the inmates. But he was deemed unstable and highly dangerous by the court and sentenced to rehabilitation in America's number one sanatorium for supervillains.

On the surface, Roger was a model patient. He didn't lash out at staff, he cooperated with his therapists, and discounting a minor disagreement with Scarecrow he never clashed with any other patients. However, all of his psychiatrists noted that it always seemed like he was repressing something.

And it was true. When he first came to Arkham, he almost never slept. He just shouted and thrashed around so much that he needed to be forcibly restrained to his bed by security. But that behaviour stopped months ago and he had shown steady signs of improvement.

At least, that was until tonight. Roger didn't know how but something had changed. He felt a presence he hadn't felt in a while. The Medusa Mask was back in Arkham Asylum. With the Medusa Mask he wasn't just weak, powerless Roger anymore. He was the mighty Psycho-Pirate. Master of emotions.

He could feel the Medusa Mask, it was somewhere in the building. It made him very happy indeed.

"It's back… It's back!" Roger couldn't control himself. He laughed and rolled around on his bed, staring blankly at the ceiling. Soon enough the mask would be his and the world would regret locking up the Psycho-Pirate.

*******

Miles away from Arkham in an apartment building that had no business still standing, the Injustice League (And associates) were gathered in the basement to discuss some plans. The Joker did not have a nice home. In fact, he would freely admit that it was a dump. But he'd gotten Harley to fix things up for company.

And by that, it meant that she'd set up two folding tables together with a bunch of chairs around them. Luthor sat at the head of the table and looked over the rest of the people he had at his command. The truth was, Lex Luthor had no idea what he was going to do. He was tired, couldn't focus on anything, in a house that probably had asbestos in it and on top of it all, he was still stuck inside a cat. But Lex Luthor was the smartest man on Earth (According to Lex Luthor, that is) and he always had a plan. Especially when he didn't have a plan.

"Arkham Asylum…. What do we all know about Arkham?" Luthor made eye contact with each person at the table as he looked around. "They say it's the most insecure prison in America. Which if true, is good news for us. But the chance of it being highly exaggerated is too great to ignore so-"

"Can you please just cut the filibuster and get to the point?" Cheetah cut Luthor off. She could tell that Lex had no idea what he was doing. Honestly, she wouldn't mind if he was more transparent about it.

"And so, I turn the table over to Joker and Harley Quinn." Lex made a hand gesture over to where Joker and Harley sat. He pretended that Cheetah had not said anything and sat back down in his chair. "They're our resident Arkham experts."

Harley starts to stand up but is pushed back into her chair by the Joker.

"Quiet, you! Only I tell you when to stand up…" Joker himself got up from his chair.

"Oh… Can I?"

Joker paused as if he was considering Harley's request. "Yes."

A giddy smile appeared on Harley's face as she hopped to her feet.

"So, what's the big deal with Arkham?" Mirror Master asked them the same way a stand up comedian would engage with their audience.

"Great question!" Joker cackled. "Well, I'll tell you what it isn't… Secure!"

"Or safe!" Harley added.

"Don't step on my punchlines, Harl…" Joker muttered. He immediately looked back to the rest of the table and regained his manic persona. "I've gotten myself thrown in there a few times just to escape for fun."

"But how exactly do you escape?" Star Sapphire asked. "We need specifics."

"The answer is simple… Chaos!" Joker yelled the last bit so loud that most of the people at the table covered their ears. "The key is, you do so much stuff, on such a large scale that nobody working there knows what's going on! And while they're chasing their own tails trying to take care of the loudest troublemaker, you sneak around and do whatever you want."

"Huh, I think that might be the smartest thing you've ever said." Cheetah said.

"Thank you." Joker bowed to Cheetah.

"Joker's right, you know." Trickster spoke up. "This one time, I broke out of Iron Heights during a riot. Took them forever to realize I even left."

"Alright, I'm glad we could workshop this." Luthor smiled.

"I've got a question. Exactly how are you supposed to cause this chaos? There are only like nine of us. And Arkham must have dozens of guards." Mercy spoke up.

"Well guess what! Me 'n Mistah J have dozens of hired whackos workin' for us!" Harley announced. "So take that, Ms. Smarty-Brain."

Harley stuck out her tongue at Mercy like a small child mocking someone.

"Don't make me come over there…" Mercy growled, reaching for a weapon she had concealed in her pocket.

"Mercy, Harley, you girls play nice. I wouldn't want you two to fight again." Luthor spoke up.

"I would!" Joker declared. "And when you're fighting, I'd film it and put it up on the internet."

"Disgusting…" Star Sapphire mumbled.

"People, can we please go back to the topic of the break in?" Black Manta spoke up.

"Yeah, let's talk about that." Mirror Master added. "How're we gonna get in there? Sure, you got a buncha goons workin' for you but what're they gonna do?"

"That's easy. We send them in to storm Arkham while we sneak from the back." Joker stated. "I've done it all before."

"And how long would it take to put together this assault?" Star Sapphire asked.

"Oh, I don't know. I can probably put it together by tomorrow." Joker shrugged.

"In that case, it would be best if we all spent the night here." Luthor said. "Do you have enough room?"

"Sure do!" Harley nodded. "This here's a big apartment. You all feel free to make yourself at home."

"Don't speak out of turn…" Joker muttered before addressing the people in front of him. "Yes, you can stay. There are plenty of empty rooms. But no indoor plumming. So use the YMCA down the street if you want to shower or use the toilet."

"They let you into the YMCA?" Black Manta asked. "You're a known criminal."

"Exactly! I intimidate them into letting me in. Threaten to kill them if they tell the police and such." Joker explained. "I suggest you do the same."

"I'll pass for now. Sounds far too brutish for my tastes." Luthor leaned back in his chair.

"Well, the house is all yours. Please, everyone, make yourselves at home." Joker smiled at the people at the table. It did nothing to make them feel more welcomed but it seemed that until further notice they were being housed by the Joker.

*******

The sun had set over Gotham City and the Injustice League was getting ready to rest up. Mirror Master had been directed to a small room with a dirty mattress and pillows without any cases. Apparently, all the rooms were like this. Of course, that didn't mean he had to like it.

Mirror Master lay down in bed with one thin sheet over around. He shifted around, trying to get comfortable but just couldn't manage it. Sleeping in his costume was always difficult, he'd barely gotten to sleep on the previous two nights. But the costume constricting him combined with the awful quality of the bed made things even more uncomfortable.

An idea on how to make things more comfortable popped into his head. Mirror Master closed his eyes and imagined a comfortable pair of women's silk pajamas. He didn't entirely grasp how Star Sapphire's power worked and hoped he was doing it right.

The gem in his forehead glowed and when Mirror Master opened his eyes up again he was in glowing purple pajamas.

"Ah, much better." Mirror Master smiled and lay back down in bed. He closed his eyes and tried to fall asleep. But when he heard the sound of the door to his room opening he sat up in bed again. "Can't a man get some sleep?"  
He looked over to the door and saw Luthor's body standing in the threshold. Which of course meant that Star Sapphire had come to visit him.

"Oh, you again. What do you want, hen?"

"Just making sure you aren't naked in my body."

Mirror Master rolled his eyes. "I'm not stupid. What makes ya think I'd do that?"

"Well, you certainly seem to like playing dress-up with me." Star Sapphire gestured to his sleepwear.

"Just wanted somethin' comfy to sleep in." Mirror Master stated. "Don't act like you've been sleepin' in Luthor's stiff old suits."

"Fine, you must forgive my paranoia. I'm just saving myself for Jordan is all." Star Sapphire casually leaned against the door.

"Oh yeah? Well, maybe ya should wear a more modest outfit. I mean, I could see a lotta cleavage." a smug smile came over Mirror Master's face.

"Silence, you." Star Sapphire scowled.

"Don't talk like that, it sounds stupid." Mirror Master chuckled.

"I spend a lot of time in outer space! Forgive me for being out of touch. Star Sapphire angrily spun herself back around and walked away from Mirror Master's room.

Mirror Master felt satisfied that he was able to sufficiently annoy Star Sapphire. He lay back down on the uncomfortable mattress and tried to fall asleep.

*******

Mercy Graves was not having a good day. Sure, she was loyal to Luthor and didn't want to argue with him. But there were plenty of places Mercy would rather be right now. And being stuck in a bunk bed under some kid in a garish costume.

"C'mon, please, I wanna trade beds with you!" Trickster groaned.

"No, I like where I'm sleeping…" Mercy pushed the pillow over her ears to drown out the sounds of Trickster's whining.

"My face is inches from the ceiling!" Trickster made himself louder. "I'm gonna bang my head when I wake up."

"Yeah, yeah, life sucks. Deal with it." Mercy rolled over in bed. "Just shut up…"

The door to their shared bedroom opened up and Harley Quinn entered the room. She looks completely miserable. Her shoulders are slouched, her mouth is turned down into a big frown, and she seems to have been crying.

"Guys… Can I stay in here tonight?" Harley asked, audibly sobbing. "Mistah J says he needs some alone time tonight…"

"Christ, one was bad enough…" Mercy mumbled.

"Uh, I'm sure Mercy would be more than happy to share her bed with you." Trickster spoke up. He smirked to himself, wanting payback at Mercy.

"Really, will ya?" Harley lit up with hope. "I know we've had our differences, but that'd be real nice of ya."

"Wait, I-"

"Oh yeah, she's fine with it. She was just talking about how much she liked you before you got here." Trickster went on.

"Thanks!" Harley rushes over to the bottom bunk and climbs in next to Mercy.

"I- You- Ugh, fine…" Mercy resigned to her situation. She takes one pillow and places it between her and Harley. "That's your side of the bed, don't come over to mine."

"Alrighty, g'night."

Mercy closed her eyes and tried to ignore Harley. Even as she fell asleep, she swore she could hear Trickster laughing at her.

*******

In another part of the apartment, Lex Luthor had yet to adjust to the bed he was in. He was used to a certain standard of living and right now he had none of it. Being stuck in Cheetah's body did him no favours. He still wasn't used to the fur that covered his body, it was highly uncomfortable to him.

He'd been having trouble finding a comfortable position to sleep in. First, he tried sleeping on his back but his tail made things very difficult. Then, he tried his stomach. But two new parts of his anatomy made that feel very unusual to him.

Finally, Luthor had turned to his side and found that it was the most comfortable of the three possibilities. But just as he closed his eyes and readied himself for sleep he was interrupted. He heard the sound of foot steps and opened his eyes again just in time to see Cheetah entering his room.

"Oh, hello there Barbara. How are you?" Lex asked. "Come to ask me something?"

"No, no, more of a checkup actually." Barbara said.

"And what are you checking on?"

"Making sure you know what you're doing. Because from what I've seen… It seems like you don't."

"I've already told you, I'm a genius. I know exactly what to do." Luthor sat up in bed.

"You can lie to yourself, but you can't lie to me." Cheetah's eyes narrowed at Lex. "Because if we mess up this Arkham job, we won't get our bodies back. I'll be a clown and you'll be a cat. And we wouldn't want that."

"Of course not." Luthor kept himself calm despite Cheetah unnerving him. He didn't like it when people saw through him. He considered himself to be untouchable and right now Cheetah was proving him wrong. "I know it may be a last minute plan, but I know exactly what I'm doing. By this time tomorrow, you'll be back in this flea-infested sack of fur you call a body."

"I don't have fleas…" Cheetah growled

"Well, sometimes it feels like it." Luthor smirked.

"Goodnight Luthor, you'd better pray that this jailbreak goes well. Otherwise… You've just made yourself a new enemy." with that, Cheetah turned back around and walked out of Luthor's view.

Luthor lay back down in bed. "It will all go fine…" he said this more for his own benefit than anyone else's. "Come tomorrow, she'll be grateful."


	8. Jailbreak

It was nearly midnight in Gotham City, Batman was on the prowl and about a mile from Arkham Asylum a highly conspicuous purple van was parked. The windows were blacked out and it had smiley faces and the phrase "Haha!" painted all over it in green. The Joker never really was one for subtlety.

Inside the van were the six members of the Injustice League, two of their personal henchwomen, and the Trickster who apparently just wanted to be part of something. Lex Luthor had put together what he thought was a genius plan and was ready to put it into action.

The vehicle was cramped and all of them barely fit together. Luthor tried to ignore this as he began talking to them.

"Ladies and gentlemen, everything's in place." Luthor proudly smiled at his assembled team. "Joker's forces are prepared to attack the Asylum mayhem while we move in on Psycho-Pirate. The nine of us will be split off into three teams. Do you all remember or do I have to remind you again?"

"We can all remember fine." Cheetah said. "Although I don't entirely understand my role as the _'Distraction'_. Aren't Joker's cronies already that?"

"Yes, but we need to keep up the appearance of it being Joker behind everything." explained Luthor. "And since you're in Joker's body I need you and Harley to pretend to be behind the whole thing. Especially if someone like Batman shows up. Just remember to stay in character as Joker, Cheetah."

Harley hugged Cheetah from the side. "Yay, heist buddies!"

"Of course… Yay…" she pushes Harley away from her.

"Hmmph, I don't think she'll be able to replicate my unique charm." Joker remarked.

"Just shut up." Luthor growled. "You had better take this seriously. Your team has the most important job."

"Then you shouldn't have given it to me."

"Do you remember what you're supposed to be doing?"

"Nope!"

"I remember." Star Sapphire spoke up. All eyes went to her. To provide her with some more protection she'd been suited up in Luthor's green and purple armor. It had been obtained last minute and Sapphire found it to be rather clunky. "Me, Joker, Trickster, and Black Manta are breaking Psycho-Pirate out of his cell. He should be in the maximum security ward."

"Very good." Luthor nodded. "Me, Mercy, and Mirror Master will be locating the Medusa Mask."

"Alright, I'm glad everything is settled." Joker cackled. "I'll tell my boys to move in and we can get this whole thing over with."

"This is going to be a disaster…" Cheetah groaned.

"Oh trust me, it's a messy job. But we have to do it." Luthor said. "Now let's go."

*******

Roger Hayden was not having what you would call a restful nights sleep. He almost never did. Arkham wasn't exactly a five star hotel, but tonight was worse than the rest. He knew the Medusa Mask was near him. He was just a few steps away from being the Psycho-Pirate once again. The only problem was, he didn't know where the Mask was or how to get it.

He heard the sounds of footsteps outside his cell. The Arkham staff had been kind enough to stop strapping him to his bed. Roger leaped up from his bed and ran to the glass door to his cell. He pressed himself up against the glass with such force that it made a noticeable sound. A passing guard heard this and rushed over to the cell.

"Jesus, Hayden… It's just you. Go to sleep." the guard grumbled and put the taser away.

"Tonight's the night… I can feel it." Roger's eye twitched.

"Don't make me come in there. Do you want me to take you to see Dr. Arkham?"

"You won't have enough time… I don't have to stay here anymore…"

"Uh huh…"

The guard started to briskly walk away from Roger's cell. Once he was a bit farther away, he took out his communicator and turned it on.

"Control, this is Moretti. Hayden's acting up. Could be planning an escape… Keep an eye on him."

Roger took a few deep breaths and went back to lying down in bed. He counted to ten and closed his eyes. And that's when the screaming, explosions, and gunshots started.

*******

The Joker's henchmen had already begun their invasion of Arkham Asylum. It was chaos with staff and patients having gone into lockdown and guards were busy fending off the armed attackers. They provided the perfect distraction while Luthor, Mirror Master, and Mercy Graves covertly snuck their way into Arkham to look for the Medusa Mask.

"Alright team, the Mask is likely in the evidence locker. Remember that." Luthor repeated to the team. "We need to get in and out quickly."

"Relax, I've done this type of job before." Mirror Master glanced over his shoulder as he made his way down the empty hallways of Arkham with the alarm blaring behind him. "I may not have my mirrors but I got all these fancy new space-powers."

"Does that mean you can teleport us to the evidence room?" Mercy raises an eyebrow.

"Good idea… Lemme check!" Mirror Master closes his eyes and the gem in Star Sapphire's head glowed purple. "I think I'm doin' it…"

All three of them were temporarily blinded by a pink light but when it faded they found themselves somewhere cramped, dark, and vaguely smelling of soap. The trio was very uncomfortably pushed up against each other all struggling to get out.

"Dammit Evan, where did you send us!" Luthor yelled. He tried to pass between the other two but he ended up stepping into what felt like a bucket of water.

"I think we're in a supply closet… Sorry, musta botched it. I don't know how these powers work."

"Can we get out of here? I don't like being so close to you too…" Mercy sighed with annoyance.

"Yeah, I think I feel a doorknob." Mirror Master said.

"That's my nose." Mercy sounded even angrier. "If you grab my breasts next, I will kick you in your currently non-existent balls."

"It was an accident, christ." Mirror Master rolled his eyes and reached around some more. He grabbed a doorknob and twisted it. With one hefty push, him, Luthor, and Mercy came tumbling out of the closet and into the path of an Arkham security guard.

The guard and the three supervillains were equally stunned for a moment. After staring at each other for what felt like way too long the guard was the first to make a move.

"Hey! We-"

The guard was cut off when Luthor struck him across the face. His hand was open and Cheetah's claws cut into the guard's face.

"Ah!" the guard doubled over in pain. Mercy took his weak moment and kneed him in the chest, knocking him down.

"I suggest we run now." Luthor said. "That attracted more attention than we needed."

The others silently agreed and started running away.

"Nice job messing this one up, McCulloch…" Luthor grimaced.

"Just shuddup…" Mirror Master glared at the back of Luthor's head as they all ran away.

*******

Elsewhere in Arkham, the part of the team tasked with capturing Psycho-Pirate himself had just infiltrated the maximum security ward of the asylum.

"Ah my old stomping grounds, there's no place like home!" Joker cackled as he walked through the halls.

"Please don't say that in my body… I still haven't gotten used to this." Black Manta said.

"You might have to get used to it." Joker glanced at him. "You never know, this whole plan might blow up in our faces."

"Don't even say that. It's been hell in this body." Star Sapphire said through gritted teeth. "Being in a man's body is hell. It never occurred to me how hairy they were."

"Lex Luthor? Hairy? Ha!" Trickster snickered.

"You're right kid! Now that's a good one!" Joker laughed.

"I'm not talking about hair on my head." Star Sapphire scowled. "I mean the hair on my chest, my legs, my armpits… Other places."

Trickster snickered some more.

"Shut up, twerp!" Star Sapphire snapped.

"You know, there isn't much security down here." Black Manta looked up and down the corridor. "Where is everybody?"

"My guys must have them all busy." said Joker. "There's nothing to stop us now!"

"Or maybe they're setting some type of trap for us…" Black Manta tapped his chin.

"Oh stop being so serious all the time. Even if it is a trap it will be fun!" Joker cheered.

The quartet of villains turned a corner and found a group of guards standing down the hall in front of them, armed with stun guns.

"All of you, stop right there!"

They froze in surprise.

"Looks like we're gonna have to fight our way out after all…" Star Sapphire muttered. "Glad I have this armour."

"Psst, Manta, how do you use your lasers again?" Joker whispered.

"There's a button on the gauntlet." Black Manta whispered back.

"I said freeze!" the guard in charge repeated himself.

"Yeah… Not gonna happen…" Trickster started reaching for the tools on his belt.

The four villains prepared for their fight and advanced on the guards. All of the security personnel seemed nervous and knew what was about to happen. But they were still prepared to fight.

*******

The lobby of Arkham Asylum had become a hub for hostages. A small crew of Joker's men were congregated there and had several doctors and guards tied up and at their mercy. Also in the room was Cheetah and Harley. Neither woman was exactly thrilled about their role as a distraction. Harley did not like the idea of having to pretend to be in love with the fake Joker and Cheetah considered Harley to be, to put it charitably, nuttier than a fruitcake.

To pass the time while waiting for authorities to arrive, Harley did some stretches. Cheetah sat on the floor and played with her hair, her cat instincts taking over her brain once again. Occasionally, she'd lick the back of her hand and use that to clean her face.

"Boss, what're you doing?" one Joker's thugs asked.

"I'm not your boss, remember." Cheetah stated. "I'm Cheetah. You know, Wonder Woman's greatest enemy."

"I thought that was the hot sorceress chick?" the thug said.

"Just shut up and get back to work…." Cheetah mumbled. She became distracted from the thug when she heard a loud thumping coming from the front doors of Arkham. "Those are locked, right?"

"Should be!" Harley stopped her stretches and went over to Cheetah. "But Batsy's gonna break through. He always does. C'mon cat-girl, you gotta get in character. You need to act like Mister J."

"I'll try…" Cheetah looked back at the thugs. "Gentlemen! Be prepared for a fight!" she lowered her voice and looked back to Harley. "Was that good?"

"Meh, close enough."

The lock broke and the doors were flung open. A pellet was thrown into the room and it burst into a cloud of smoke on impact with the ground. If Cheetah was in her own body her vision would have been much better but in the body of a, relatively speaking, normal man she was blinded by the haze.

She could hear what sounded like the goons Joker employed getting beaten up by Batman. When she felt a hand touch her arm she nearly punched whoever it belonged to before she realized it belonged to Harley.

"Ah! Don't do that to me!"

"Heh, sorry… Uh, we should probably get outta here before Batsy bashes both our skulls in."

"He doesn't kill people, that's his one thing. Wonder Woman, she's killed people. You saw what happened to Maxwell Lord."

"Well, yeah… But Batsy sure knows how to hurt people good."

The smoke finally dispersed leaving Cheetah and Harley to look over all the unconscious or injured goons with Batman standing in the middle.

"I'm patient today, Joker." Batman stared down him and Harley. "What's your game this time?"

"My game? Oh, nothing of course. I'm insane. I don't need any reasons." Cheetah did her best to sound like Joker but found it somewhat difficult. "There's nothing I love more than spreading chaos and anarchy!"

"Yeah! My Mr. J does things just 'cause he feels like it!" Harley hugged Cheetah to sell their act a bit more.

"There's always a reason, Joker. Even with you." Batman reached for his utility belt and advanced on the two of them.

"Maybe there is maybe there isn't. You'll have to catch me and my darling Harlequin first!" Cheetah fumbled around in his Joker's pocket for a moment and pulled out a smoke bomb of her own. She threw it down on the ground and started running with Harley closely tailing her.

"Hey, kitty, do you know what we're doing?" Harley asked.

"We just need to lead Batman around until the others finish their job." Cheetah whispered.

"And how long will that take?"

"Knowing them… I'm not sure. Just run."

*******

Luthor section of the Injustice League had been in a frenzied state of running ever since their encounter with the guard. Despite how it may have looked, they had actually been making quite a bit of progress. Even in their hurry, Luthor carefully guided them closer to the evidence room.

"Around the corner! We're almost there!" Luthor barked orders at the other two.

"You'd better know what we're doing, Lex." Mercy sighed.

"Oh Mercy, haven't we been through this? I always know what I'm doing." Luthor smirked.

They followed Luthor around a corner and came to a large metal vault door at the end of the hall. The group all stopped in front of the obstacle and considered what to do.

"Well… This poses a problem" Luthor remarked. "I don't think my claws can cut through that. And, no offence Mercy, but you only have the capabilities of a normal human."

"Stand back people, I'll handle this." Mirror Master cracked his knuckles and stepped past the other two.

"Oh yeah, because that went so well last time." Mercy groaned and rolled her eyes.

"Just shuddup, awright? I can do this." Mirror Master's gem glowed again.

Luthor made no protests. At that moment their only way into the vault was by forcefully blasting it down. And Mirror Master was the only way he could do it.

A large beam of pink energy was projected from Mirror Master's forehead and into the vault door. The result was an explosion that, once Luthor and Mercy recovered from the loud sound it made, created a hole in the vault.

"Who doesn't know how to use their powers now?" Mirror Master proudly crossed his arms. He held his head high as he walked into the vault with Luthor and Mercy right behind him.

"Don't get too full of yourself." Luthor said. In a rare moment of self wareness he added on. "It's bad enough when I do it."

They stepped into the vault and found that it was empty. Another shining example of Arkham Asylum's security.

"Alright, we need to find the Medusa Mask. It's a lot of ground to cover." Luthor scanned around the room. "I'll check H for Hayden, Mirror Master you take P for Psycho-Pirate, and Mercy you make sure nobody gets in here."

The three of them split off and went to where Luthor assigned them. Luthor went to the section with all the "H" names and after only a minute or so found the box marked "Hayden, Roger".

"Everyone, over here. I found it!" Luthor triumphantly declared.

The other two gathered around Luthor as he pulled open the box.

"Hmm, the lock's broken." Luthor observed. "More fine work from the people at Arkham Asylum."

He looked into the box and saw Psycho-Pirate's personal items neatly set down in the box. The one item that seemed displaced was the Medusa Mask, a featureless golden mask, which seemed to be askew.

"Hmm… It's almost like the mask forced its way into the box…" Luthor reached out and took the mask and Psycho-Pirate's folded up costume from the box.

"Yeah, yeah, that's real interesting and all but can we please get out of here?" Mirror Master asked.

"Do you think you can teleport us again without messing up." Mercy asked Mirror Master.

"I can try…" Mirror Master closed his eyes. "Okay, now what did the van look like again…"

Mercy glanced back at the door and saw a small group of guards coming towards them. "Get us out of here now!"

A flash of pink light emanated from Mirror Master's gem. When the light faded from their vision, the trio found themselves back inside the Joker's van. They were all relieved when they realized where they were.

"So you do know how to use those powers… Good work." Mercy said.

"Yeah, apparently I do." Mirror Master smirked.

"Do you think you can use them to get the others back in here?" Luthor asked.

"I dunno… Maybe."

"That's good enough for me."

*******

Roger Hayden screamed in agony on his bed. He still didn't know why, but he could feel the Medusa Mask leaving him. The blaring alarm made the pounding in his head worse. He could have been Psycho-Pirate again, but now it was being taken away from him. Everything inside Roger told him that he needed to escape.

He got up from his bed and slowly stepped towards the door. Even though he didn't know how, he was now determined to escape. As fortune would have it, a red laser beam just then went straight at the door to his cell from out of left field. Roger jumped back and ducked under his bed. When the smoke cleared, Roger looked up and saw a man in what appeared to be some kind of diving suit entering his cell. He recognized the man as Black Manta, an enemy of Aquaman. Roger, of course, had no context for all the mind switching that had been going on.

"Alright bucko, you wouldn't happen to be the, er, Psycho-Pirate, would you?" Joker asked as the three other members of his section entered the room.

"Y-yes, that's me?" Roger slowly stood back up again. "Who are you people? Do you have my mask?"

"Not us personally, but we'll get it to you." Black Manta said.

"Oh, thank you. I need the mask…" Roger got closer to them.

"I'll call Luthor now, tell him the good news. I think there's a communicator on my wrist…" Star Sapphire pressed a button on the wrist of Luthor's armour and then spoke into it. "Lex, this is Sapphire. We got the guy."

_"Good, I'll have Mirror Master bring you out of there."_

"What? Is he- Does McCulloch know how to use my powers?"

_"More or less."_

The four villains listened as Luthor said something to Mirror Master in the background.

"I don't like the sound of this…" Trickster said.

After standing there for only a couple seconds the five of them were blinded by a sudden flash of pinkish-purple light that came out of nowhere. For a moment, it felt like they were falling and they all ended up flat on their backs. When their vision cleared up again they were lying on the floor of Joker's van.

"Oh, that was fun…" Joker mumbled. "How 'bout we do it again sometime?"

"Ah, Roger Hayden, the Psycho-Pirate, so good to see you…" Lex Luthor approached Roger and helped him up to the ground.

Instantly, Roger noticed the Medusa Mask in his hand. "The Mask! I need it!"

"Not so fast, Hayden. We still need two more members of our cabal to arrive…"

*******

Up in Arkham's belltower, Cheetah was now realizing why she doesn't visit Gotham City. She always assumed Batman would be slow, her certainly looked bulky. But seeing as he'd been chasing her and Harley around for some time that did not seem to be the case.

Cheetah looked behind her as she hurried up the stairs and saw no signs of Batman much to her relief.

"Harley, I think we lost him."

"Don't say that. Now I know he's gonna surprise us!"

It appeared that Harley was right. Batman fell down from the ceiling and landed on the stairs right in front of them.

"Nowhere to run."

"Now Batman… Can't we talk it out?"

"Stop trying to stall me. Where is the real Joker?"

Both Cheetah and Harley were surprised by how quickly was able to deduce that it wasn't actually Joker in front of him.

"What are you talkin' about? This is the real Mistah J! Right puddin'?" Harley hugged Cheetah by her side.

"Stop that!" Cheetah pushed Harley away.

"Your body language is different, more acrobatic. Almost femenine." Batman got closer to the both of them.

"Dammit, dammit, dammit! Just run!" Cheetah turned back around and started running. Harley quickly followed after her.. She reached into the pocket of Joker's jacket and pulld out a communicator. "Luthor! Where the hell are you? It's Batman! He knows I'm not the real Joker."

_"Calm down, I was just about to call you. I'll have Mirror Master bring you out."_

"But there aren't any mirrors near me!"

_"That's not what I meant."_

Luthor hung up and mere moments later Cheetah realized that she was emitting a pink glow. She looked to Harley and realized she was doing the same.

"Do you know what this means?" Cheetah asked.

"Nope, ain't got a clue."

The glow quickly became a blinding flash that left both women feeling like they were simultaneously floating and falling. Harley hit the ground first and felt a blunt pain in her back.

"Owie! Where am I now…"

Cheetah landed next with Harley cushioning her fall.

"Urgh… Where the hell are we now?" Cheetah looked around and saw her partners in crime as well as the recently freed Psycho-Pirate.

"Hey! Hands off of Harley!" Joker exclaimed. "Only I get to pin her to the ground."

"Hi Mistah J!" Harley cheered and pushed Cheetah away from her. "Did we win?"

"In a way, yes." Luthor stepped forward and helped Cheetah off the ground. "Mr. Hayden here is going to help us all get back to normal."

"Good, I'll tell my boys to retreat and we'll get back to the old Injustice League hideout." Joker said.

Roger was still dumbfounded as to what was happening around him. He was seriously out of the loop here.

"I'm sorry…. What's going on here? Why do you need me?" Roger asked. "And can I have my mask back?"

"We'll get to that." Luthor glanced at him before returning his attention to the rest of the Injustice League. "By the end of the day, everything will be the way it was before…"


	9. The Way Things Were

It had been decided by the Injustice League that it was no longer safe to stay in Gotham City following the attack on Arkham Asylum. So they drove Joker's van across state lines and over to the crumbling remains of Lex Luthor's hidden Injustice League hideout. Throughout the entire trip, Psycho-Pirate had been confused about what was happening and wouldn't stop demanding that he have his Medusa Mask back.

But now, they had returned to the hideout. Roger had insisted on getting dressed in his Psycho-Pirate outfit before he did anything else. Luthor agreed and sent him into his personal bedroom to change but had kept the Medusa Mask on his person. After spending so much time trying to get it, he didn't want Psycho-Pirate running off with it.

The Injustice League, and friends, were waiting in the partially collapsed hallway outside Luthor's room. Some were sitting on the floor while others stood or paced around. The six villains who had had their brains involuntarily switched around were the most anxious to see Psycho-Pirate again.

"Come on… How long is he going to take… I hate being inside this thing." Star Sapphire looked at her body. "No offence, Luthor."

"None taken. I'm not fond of being a cat." Luthor remarked.

"Hey, it's not that bad." Cheetah crossed her arms.

"Everything's itchy, how do you explain that one?"

"Clearly, you haven't been grooming yourself."

"I'm sure you like having hair, eh Luthor?" Joker chuckled.

"Ugh, just shut up." Luthor groaned.

Mirror Master sat down on the floor. "I'm gonna be glad to have my body back. No offence to you ladies, but I don't think I like bein' a woman."

"None taken." Cheetah said.

"Think the weirdest part was havin' to piss sittin' down."

"Real classy, Evan." Trickster rolled his eyes.

"Wait a minute, does that mean you've seen my… My…" a look of anger came across Star Sapphire's face.

"What was I supposed to do? It's not like it was pleasant or anything." Mirror Master shrugged. "Besides, you've had to use the bathroom too. Ya definitely got a look at Luthor's junk."

"Can we change the subject?" Black Manta spoke up. "This is juvenile."

"I thought it was kinda funny." Harley giggled.

"Harley, do everyone a favour and shut up." Joker told her.

"Thank you." Mercy nodded.

"It's only been a few days and I swear, this has been hell." Cheetah crossed her arms. "Can we all make an agreement?"

"What is it?" Black Manta asked.

"Let's all pretend that none of this ever happened." Cheetah said. "Can you imagine if someone else found out about this fiasco? We'd never be taken seriously again."

"I couldn't agree more." Luthor nodded. "No knowledge of the last few days shall leave this room."  
"But Lexy, you gotta admit… This whole situation, it's a little funny." Joker smiled underneath Black Manta's helmet.

"Yeah, he's right." Trickster chuckled.

"You're not the one with your brains switched around." Mirror Master scowled.

"Alright, fine. My lips are sealed." Trickster nodded. "Can't say the same for Joker though, you know how he is."

"Guilty as charged!" Joker cackled.

The conversation came to an end when the door to Luthor's office and Roger Hayden stepped out decked out in his full red and black Psycho-Pirate garb.

"I'm ready! Give me the Medusa Mask!" he declared.

"He stole my look!" Harley hopped up from the ground and looked back and forth between her outfit and Psycho-Pirate's. "You're dressed just like me."

"I've been a supervillain since you were pretending to learn ninth grade geometry!" Psycho-Pirate yelled. "Now somebody give me the Mask. I need it!"

"I have it right here." Luthor kept his voice calm as he held out the Medusa Mask to him. "I trust that you'll honour our deal…"

"You almost deserve your fate for thinking you could control my mask." Psycho-Pirate smirked.

"Alright, I guess I'll keep it then." Luthor brought the mask closer to himself.

"No! Please!" Psycho-Pirate took several steps closer to him. "I'll do what you say. Your minds will be returned."

"Good, glad you could see it our way." Luthor handed the Medusa Mask off to Psycho-Pirate.

He quickly snatched up the mask and put it on his face, adjusting it to make sure it's straight.

"Just like a second skin to me…" Psycho-Pirate sighed. "Alright, now for you fools to have your minds back where they belong. I think they've learned not to meddle with me."

Psycho-Pirate looked around at the faces of the six mixed-up villains, staring into each of their eyes. He said nothing but behind his mask they each saw a list of determination.

"I something supposed to be-" Mirror Master had no chance to finish his thought when a shockwave emitted from Psycho-Pirate which collided with everyone else in the room, knocking them all to the floor.

*******

Hours passed while the nine villains were unconscious. They all awoke at the same time at just the right moment to see the enormous hole left in the roof of the hideout. Presumably, it was Psycho-Pirate's doing. The six Injustice Leaguers didn't have much time to think about that. Instead, they each looked down at their respective bodies. All of them smiled with relief when they realized that everything was back the way it was.

"Hahaha! Finally, my gorgeous face is mine again!" Joker cheered, feeling his face.

"Hell yeah it is!" Harley got up from the ground and went over to Joker straddling him. "We can have some real fun now, eh Mr. J?"

"Get off of me you idiot!" Joker pushed Harley to the side stood up himself.

"Oh, I'll get you off baby…"

"Stop talking for one miserable moment!"

"Hmm, it seems this outfit isn't as comfortable as it looks." Cheetah got up from the ground and looked up at the outfit Luthor had put her in. "This simply won't do. I'll have to get changed."

"Well, I liked it." Luthor stood up as well.

"Yeah, and it's my outfit." Mercy mumbled as she got to her feet.

"Oh thank god, I'm back in my own body." Black Manta sighed. "When I take off this helmet I'd better not have any clown makeup on."

"As nice as it is to be in my own body… Is nobody else going to acknowledge that hole the roof?" Star Sapphire used her newly regained powers to levitate back upright.

"Y'know, I was thinkin' the same thing." Mirror Master nodded.

"That's probably the work of that Psychopath guy you hired." Trickster casually got back up. "With a name like that, you really should've seen it coming."

"It doesn't matter, now what we're back to normal the Injustice League can resume operations." Luthor straightened out his tie and smirked.

"Actually Luthor, I think I'm done with your team." Star Sapphire stated.

"Me too Lexy. It was fun, but after that I think I'll stick to Gotham for a while." Joker nodded.

"Yeah, I don't want to get my brain switched around again." Cheetah nodded.

With those three out of the way, a general murmur of an agreement was heard throughout the room. Slowly, people started to walk away from the area until all that remained was Mercy and Luthor standing underneath the hole that Psycho-Pirate created in the ceiling.

"You guys can't just do this!" Mercy shouted after the people leaving. "You're the goddamn Injustice League!"

"Leave them, Mercy." Luthor put a hand on Mercy's shoulder. "I'll assemble a new team. And rebuild this place. Come with me, let's get back to Lexcorp."

"Alright. The car's just outside. C'mon." Mercy started to walk down the hallway and beckoned Luthor to follow her.

Luthor nodded and followed after her.

"So you really wanna reset the roster for the Injustice League?" Mercy glanced over at Luthor.

"Yes. This whole affair has made me realize we do not work together very well." Luthor sighed. "I'm thinking of bringing in some of the guys from the old Legion of Doom. Scarecrow, Giganta, Toyman, maybe even Solomon Grundy. Those were the days."

"I think that's a bit before my time, Lex."

"My apologies, Mercy. Well, you'll meet them soon enough. And now, everything's back to normal."

"Actually… I think Sapphire mentioned something about promising Teschmacher a raise when she was in your body."

Luthor grimaced as he made it to the elevator and pressed the button. "I'll deal with that when it's time. The important thing is, I have my body back. And that means Lex Luthor is here to stay…"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, this story was an interesting experiment. I went into it without much of a plan and managed to complete it. I also experimented with more low brow/edgy comedy than I'm used to. So that was interesting. Not sure if I'll do any more stories like this in the future. Sometimes it felt like I made characters go OOC for the sake of a joke. Not to mention I wasn't familiar with some of the featured characters to begin with. But still, it was a little fun to write. Thanks for reading.


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